138 Hilarious Short People Jokes That Will Make You Laugh All Day

You might think short people jokes are made to make fun of people for their height. But the reality is otherwise.

However, we are no one to make assumptions or judgements about people’s intentions, short people jokes might be triggering to some people. But the good news is, some might actually enjoy short people jokes.

You can crack these jokes to tease your short friends or siblings. Short people jokes should not be taken seriously because human beings have evolved to make jokes out of any situation.

You might know a person or two who are relatively shorter in height, crack these jokes in front of them and enjoy a good laugh. Here are some short person jokes to make you laugh.

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Best Short People Jokes

Looking for best short people jokes? You have found your place because this category has the best short person jokes at your service. Tease your short friends with these jokes and have fun.

I heard short people can hear what the ancestors are saying since they’re so close to the ground. You’re the literal definition of down to earth.

When short people smoke weed, they don’t get high. They get medium.

You know you’re short if you think the people on the wedding cake are the actual bride and groom.

How do short people go shopping for pants?
They buy shorts.

It’s not that I am short, I simply have a built for speed and accuracy.

Why did the short guy buy the house with the water fountain?
Because he’s always wanted to own a swimming pool.

Short people- We maintain a great perspective on life because we are always looking up!

For a basketball team, what position does a short player play?
The ball.

What do short people call miniature golf?

What do short people call burritos?
Sleeping bags.

I met a midget the other day and asked him “what is it like being a dwarf?”
He replied “I’m not happy”
I then said to him “well, which one are you then?”

I love short people. I find them to be more down to earth.

Have you ever noticed that there is a garment called shorts? Because I can’t recall ever seeing a piece of clothing called talls.

You can crawl into tight spaces like all those little rodents. You should consider it your super power.

Funny Short People Jokes

This category has funny short people jokes which will make you chuckle. These small people jokes are meant to be funny and does not intend to hurt short people’s feelings.

Midgets tend to get angry quickly because they are so close to the ground their anger does not dissipate quickly.

What do short people refer to an i-Pad?
A desktop computer.

Why do midgets always laugh when they play soccer?
Because the grass tickles their balls.

Someone once asked me, “Doesn’t it hurt your back while ducking under the door?” I replied, “Well, doesn’t it hurt your legs to reach for the top shelf?”

Have you ever noticed that short people have more role models than anyone else? It’s because they are looking up to everyone.

What 3 things does a short person need to take a bath?
Floaties, a snorkel, and a lifeguard.

I met a midget once, my conversation with her was extremely awkward. I am not very good when it comes to small talk.

Me to my short friend: Wow, you really love drinking coffee.
Short friend, drinking her fifth cup of the day: Yes, I need the ‘pick-me-up’.

I automatically start swinging my feet like a little kid when sitting in a chair that’s too tall for me.

Have you heard about the psychic midget who escaped from jail?
He’s a small medium who’s at large.

What is a short person’s favorite side dish?
A small fry.

I raised the alarm at work today. The midgets were furious.

My short friend is determined to succeed in life. He’s working out, eating healthy and studying hard. He raised the bar to medium.

What do you call a short person with a bad spray tan?
An Oompa Loompa.

Hilarious Short People Jokes

Short height jokes are the best! They are the best way to make fun of a person without hurting their feelings. Enjoy these hilarious short people jokes with your friends.

Stop making jokes on short people It’s not funny if the person getting trolled can’t enjoy it. After all, most of the jokes go way over their heads.

Why do the short people like flying coach?
The extra legroom.

Why don’t midgets use tampons?
Because they keep tripping over the string.

Having to run to keep at the same pace as an average person walking normally.

I am starting a charity to teach short people maths. It’s called making the little things count.

Why did the short guy wear stilts?
So he could be as tall as everyone else.

I saw my midget neighbour at a bus stop
“Jump in, I’ll give you a lift home” I said.
“Bugger off” he shouted back.
“What an ungrateful little man” I thought as I zipped up my backpack and continued my walk.

If short people formed their own country, what would their national anthem be?
‘It’s a small world after all’.

What do you call a Mexican midget?
Minimum wage.
How do you pay him?
Under the table.

What is the best way for a short person to reach the top shelf?
They don’t.

What’s a short person’s favorite thing on the menu?
Short ribs.

I asked a dwarf to lend me 5 dollars yesterday. He said, “Sorry, I’m a little short.”

Every morning, I drive to work using my GPS. It takes me 40 minutes.
Yesterday, I picked up my tiny friend and he offered to drive. We arrived at the office in 15 minutes, which left me very surprised.
Me: How did you do that?
Tiny friend: I took a ‘short’ cut.

What makes midgets so good at picking up girls?
They are amazing at small talk.

When your friend drop something and they ask you to get it because you’re closer to the ground.

I find your lack of height in tall-erable.

Why are short people always thirsty?
They can’t reach the drinking fountains.

Good Short People Jokes

This category entertains good jokes for short people. When you want to crack a joke without ill intentions, this category is for you. So have fun teasing your short friends.

Short people are the future. They consume less food, use less car fuel, and more of them fit on Earth. They are eco-friendly humans.

What is a short person’s favorite dessert?
Strawberry short cake.

I am not short. I’m kicks to the shins and uppercuts to the nuts size.

I saw a really short guy walking to catch a bus today. When he saw it coming down the road he broke into a jog. It was getting closer and he still wasn’t at the bus stop so started sprinting but it drove off before he got there. It was too little too late.

You shouldn’t make fun of short people. Because it’s a little person too…I mean a little too personal.

“Keep looking up.” – Motivational advice for most people. Necessary advice for short people.

Why wouldn’t you hire short people as chefs?
Because the steaks are too high.

Appreciate the little things. Give a short person a hug.

Jump up 10 times each morning it would help you elongate yourself.

I tell short people to reach for the stars. They are always a bit short of reach.

Two short people were arguing. I believe they had a ‘little’ disagreement.

Do you realize your head would make the most flawlessly awesome armrest?

I read a headline that said “Short people are less intelligent than taller people. That can’t be true. Einstein was 5’7” and Stephen Hawking was 3’5″

I had to wait a really long time for my food at the midget restaurant.
I am guessing it was because they were short staffed.

Short People Jokes One Liners

Want to destroy a short person with a single line? If yes then this category of funny jokes for small people is for you. Tease your friends with these short people one liners.

You know you’re short when you use an espresso cup as a regular coffee mug.

Being the same height, shoe, and clothing size for the rest of your life since you were in 6th grade.

Attack on Titan is actually slice of life for short people.

I’m not short. I’m just concentrated awesome.

Why do short people love shoe stores?
The mirrors are the perfect height.

Wearing heels almost makes you the same size as other people on the face of earth.

Does anyone know the PC term for short people? Or do yall also struggle with gnomenclature

I’ll tell you what really catches my eye. Short people with umbrellas.

What do you call it when a short person waves at you?
A microwave.

Cooking turns into a workout because I have to climb the counters.

You’re so short I bet you don’t have to bend to tie your shoelaces.

You appear as though regardless you have a great deal of growing up to do.

Short People Jokes for Adults

This category has short people jokes for adults. you might find them a little less family friendly so bear with use. You can make these jokes to your short friends to tease them.

My friend who’s really short had a party the other night and he only invited other really short people.

You shouldn’t make fun of short people. Because, it’s a little person too… I mean a little too personal.

God only lets things grow until they are perfect. Some of us didn’t take as long as others! –Short People.

You’re so short that when you get angry at people for making fun of you, all you can do is bite their ankles.

Height bullying is no joke. Seriously guys, we need to stop looking down on short people.

I can see you’ve chosen not to grow over the past few years.

The reason why people are short is because their dad never came back with the milk.

My friend is so short that using him hurdle race would be an easy walk over.

Never fight short people. They hit below the belt.

Someone said, “You are so tall that if you break your leg, you will use ladders as crutches”. I simply replied, “I have no time to put up with you guys. Life is short, just like you”.

My short friends are very honest people. They are incapable of telling ‘tall tales’.

Must be intense requiring a stage stool to kiss your significant other farewell every day.

Short People Jokes about Their Problems

Ever wondered how short people tackle with their problems? They might be unable to reach a chips packet at the supermarket because the shelves are too high. These short people problems jokes will have you laughing until you crack your ribs.

Why was the short person stuck in the elevator?
Because they could not reach the door open button.

You hardly see a short person being fat at the same time. They have to do a lot of exercise going up and down the kitchen.

Why do short people have a hard time raising a family?
Because they struggle to put food on the table.

Why do midgets always have food in their teeth?
Because they cannot pick up a toothpick.

Why was the short guy scared of the wiener dog?
Because it was too tall.

I hate it when you’re sitting in the cinema ready to watch the movie and the next thing you know BOOM. Human giraffe sits in front of you.

Two tall guys walk into a bar. Why didn’t the short guy walk into the bar too? He walked under it.

Why don’t midgets need a concrete wall to play handball?
They are able to just use the curb.

Where is the worst place for a short person to stand at a concert?
Behind anyone at all.

Short People Problem: Because you are too short, the sun visor doesn’t even work while you’re driving.

You’ve gotten really hand it to short people… Mainly because they can’t reach it.

Tall people and Short people should never date. Long distance relationships never work out.

Short People Jokes and Memes

Short people memes are a ruthless way to make fun of your short friend. We never thought of steeping so low but let us have fun teasing our friends. Laugh at these jokes about short men until your stomach hurts.

In some countries it’s against the rules for a short person to drive, because they can’t see where they’re going.

I tried to go into a midget nightclub last night.
The bouncer stopped me on the door and said I couldn’t go in.
I asked, “Why not?”
He said, “Because you’re not on the shortlist.”

What do you call a door for short people?
A doggy door.

A midget heads to a job interview. He humbly describes all of the advantages of his height pertaining to the job.
The interviewer could see that he really was selling himself short.

Everyone knows that it’s easier to bury short people. All you need to do is find the right shoe box.

How does a short person take a bath?
They get into the sink!

Do you need a stool so you can see my breasts?
You’re so short, you must need a ladder to reach your advice/dreams.

Sometimes I want to make a joke about short people. But, I don’t want to stoop to their level.

What does a short pirate do with a toothpick?
They use it as a peg leg.

Being a 6’3 comedian…
a lot of my jokes revolve around short people. However, after receiving multiple complaints, I’ve decided to stop making short jokes now.
I’m above that.

Have you heard about those self-driving cars? It turns out it was just a bunch of short people driving around.

My local funeral home is offering a 2 for 1 deal on coffins…
but only to short people.

What’s the difference between North Korea and the North Pole?
One of them is forever ruled by a jolly fat man who directs an entire race of short people to produce packages he can drop from the sky all over the world, and the other is the North Pole.

I’m upset with my tiny friend who couldn’t attend my party. He gave me ‘short’ notice.

Funniest Short People Jokes

Want to cackle and chuckle until your lungs can’t take it anymore? We have the funniest short people jokes for you. These short jokes about short people will have you laughing on the floor.

I was shocked to read in the papers today that a dwarf had been pickpocketed. I just thought to myself, how could someone stoop so low?

You are so short, I bet your parents left you at home most times when they went to the pool, because they’re scared you’ll drown in the kiddie pool.

Why are short people oppressed?
Because they’re always overlooked.

These two midgets were sat there bored one day.
Then one of them said to the other, “Let’s smoke some weed and get medium.”

What do short people call something that’s too high up?
Absolute zero, because it’s impossible to reach.

Why couldn’t the short guy finish the fun-sized candy bar?
It was too big!

Why did the short guy fall asleep in his harness and his helmet?
Because he was tired from climbing into bed.

You know you’re short when your kids can keep things out of your reach.

What did the nurse say to the midget in the hospital waiting room?
You are just going to have to be a little patient.

What’s so offensive about short people jokes?
I consider them the height of comedy.

What do you call short people who work on fans?
Midget spinners

You know you’re short when people ask you which Minion character you played in the movie.

Do you know what a little get together is?
A short people party. Must be so hard being over looked all the same.

Short People Jokes That Will Make You Laugh

This category has hilarious jokes for short people. You will laugh at them until you are teary eyed. Tease your short friends with these jokes. Have a good time laughing at your friends.

At least one advantage of being small is getting to be in front in all pictures every time.

Sometimes when I look at short people I wonder…
If they’re able to reach their goals.

Short people are materialistic. Tall people are bigger than that. They can see past it.

My dad was a midget but I still could never beat him in a running race.
No matter how fast I ran, he was always a little father ahead.

Behind every short woman is a house decoration that was being hidden.

Why did the short person bring a parachute to the bar?
So they could get down from the barstool.

Why can you lie in front of short people without consequences?
It goes over their heads.

How do short people shoot a bow and arrow?
With a rubber band and a toothpick.

You feel you are short, when you have to ask a stranger to help you get something from the top shelf at the grocery store.

Really gotta give it to short people. Otherwise we might fall off the counter trying to get it ourselves.

Why do you need to explain jokes to short people?
To make sure it doesn’t go over their head.

Short individuals will in general blow up effectively, in light of the fact that they’re so near the ground their indignation doesn’t disperse effectively.

Tall vs. Short
Tall People: “I’m somewhere around 6 feet.”
Short People: “I’m 5 feet and 5.756432841 inches.”

Yes, I’m short. Makes me mad and I will bite your knees off.

Final Thoughts on Short People Jokes

The jokes about short people are lighthearted and simple. There is nothing offensive in short people jokes.

However, you should be mindful of a person’s feeling before making short person jokes because not everyone can take a joke. Make a joke when you know the person has the tolerance to take it.

Some people actually enjoy making fun of themselves so crack as much jokes as you want in front of them.

Some of your short friends might enjoy these jokes, make sure to tease them jokingly.

The short people jokes will make you laugh hard because they are the simplest and funniest jokes. These short people jokes are solely for the purpose of lighten up the mood and have a good time.

We hope you like the jokes. You can take inspiration from these jokes and invent a joke of your own. Be creatively funny and have a good time laughing at a short friend.

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