115 Funny Tall People Jokes for Your Giraffe-Like Friends
If we have joked about anyone apart from their looks, it’s their height always. Regardless of the fact that many jokes revolve around short people, we have managed to gather an absolute collection of tall people jokes.
Make sure to dedicate this page full of tall jokesto all the Giraffe-like friends from the shorties!
Although, short people are somehow tolerant towards the jokes made about their height but when it comes to tall people, they are absolutely not!
Tall people jokesare a fabulous way to pull the legs of your tall friends and let them also taste their own medicine, kidding!
Thus, if you are a shortie, who has defended themselves all their lives with a saying; “God only let people grow until they reach reflection” then we guess it’s high time for you to put them on the back foot with these hilarious tall people jokes.
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Table of Contents
Best Tall People Jokes
Are you also in need of the best tall people jokes to make a comeback? Well, then keep your all worries aside because we have gathered the perfect jokes about being tall. Have a look!
It’s not tall people’s fault they think they’re the center of the universe. They just can’t see anyone else.
What does a tall person and a broken lightbulb have in common?
They are both not very bright at all.
Why are the Dutch so tall?
So they can keep their heads above sea level.
You are so tall that you need three blankets when you’re cold.
What’s the most popular sport for tall women?
Wrestling each other over men who are taller than them.
What’s the difference between a clown and a tall person?
Their shoe store.
Yo mama is so tall on Christmas when you sit on her head you can see santa flying away in his sleigh.
In elementary school, in case of fire you have to line up quietly in a single file line from smallest to tallest.
“What is the logic?”
“Do tall people burn slower?”
What do a tall wizard and a tall elf have in common?
They both needed a short hobbit to save their butts.
I don’t always regret my height. But when I do, it’s usually after I just bumped my head on something.
Someone said, “You are so tall that if you break your leg, you will use ladders as crutches”. I simply replied, “I have no time to put up with you guys. Life is short, just like you”.
You are so tall that no matter where you go, you can always see your house.
Whenever a tall person smacks their head on a doorway, somewhere a short person is smiling.
Every random girl to a tall girl: “You’re so lucky that you don’t have to wear shoes.”
Did you know that the queen is only a foot tall?
She’s a ruler.
Tall people are the giraffes of the human race that went extinct since the beginning of time.
Funny Tall People Jokes
We all can agree that it’s hard to find jokes either on short or tall people that are funny and non-offensive at the same time. Take a gaze at the given funny tall people jokes and have a blast with your tall friends.
How’d the tall person break into working at Wells Fargo?
After six years of being an excellent coat rack, they decided to let her have her own desk.
I’m reaching new heights with my puns.
A friend advised me not to take the bus as my tall person head would touch the bus roof. I replied, “That’s really insensitive. I use the term vertically inclined”.
What did the doctor say about the tall person who was in a rush to see him?
“I just wish he was a little patient.”
A guy walks in a bar and sees a tall beautiful girl:
“Oh, you’re really tall.”
“You should see me in heels.”
So a man walks into a coffee house late in the afternoon and asks for a tall drink with 4 shots of espresso and the rest filled with milk.
The barista looks at him lightly concerned and she says,
“Are you sure sir? That’s a latte coffee.”
What do tall people and chopsticks have in common?
They’re awkward at the most inopportune moments.
Tall people are only good for two things: Laughing at them, and getting things from the top shelf.
Yo Mama so tall, she got put in the Giraffe Section when visiting a petting zoo.
You’re so tall that even in the summer time you still have snow on your head.
Your shorter friend decides they need to sit in the front seat, then complains when your knees are in their back.
My roommate Esther and I wanted to get a new rug for our apartment, but we didn’t have a tape measure. So we had to use Esther’s height to guess the approximate dimensions we wanted. We bought a rug one Esther wide by two Esthers long. You could say we…
I whispered back when someone made fun of my height. When he asked what I said, I replied, “Whatever I said went literally above your head”.
My girlfriend tried to approach me when we first met with this line and this is how we ended up together: “Hello, I didn’t know you will come in the king size. Now I’m even more excited to try you.”
I answered my front door this morning and was punched in the face by a 5 foot tall beetle. That must have been the nasty bug that’s going around.
How did the tall person get that job on Walls street?
He first worked as a coat rack for three years before they decided to let him have his own desk.
Do you need a sunroof in your car?
No, do your parents drive you to school in a minivan?
Did you know the Hover Dam was supposed to be twice as tall as it is now?
After some re-evaluation, they thought it would be 2 dam high.
I’ll see myself out…
Hilarious Tall People Jokes
Do you have some male friends who are extraordinarily tall? If so, then these jokes for tall guys will work perfectly for you to pull their legs and have a good laugh after a long time. Check it out!
You are so tall that you had to rip the front seat out of your car so you could sit in the back seat and drive it.
A seven foot tall woman who looks exactly like Al Gore’s wife walks into a bar. The bartender says, “I’ll bet she’s a big Tipper.”
A taller guy of his kind arrives home later:
What are those on the collar, men? Lipstick stains?
No, blood! I was hit by a car.
Good luck!
A husband and a wife have four children. The oldest three are tall with blonde hair; the youngest is short with brown hair. The husband was on his deathbed and said, “honey, can you be completely honest with me? Is our youngest son mine?” The wife said, “I swear to all that is holy, he is your son.”
Then the husband died, and his wife muttered, “thank god he didn’t ask about the other three.”
Tall people: where the family will meet if someone gets lost in a crowd.
It is better to have loved a short man, than never to have loved a tall.
What do you say to sprinter jumping from 100 meters tall building committing suicide?
I’m sure you gonna break your personal best.
A big benefit of tall people is that you don’t need to come downstairs to shake their hand. You can do it right from the balcony.
Have you ever noticed that there is a garment called shorts? Because I can’t recall ever seeing a piece of clothing called talls.
In order to get your friends out of self-pity you have to tell them your shoe size and pant length.
You’re so tall you can sit on the golden gate bridge and soak your feet in the ocean.
How do you realize you’re a tall person?
In most of the pictures you take… you appear headless.
How tall is the average diabetic person?
About as tall as the average person, minus two feet.
What do you do when you see a tall intelligent person?
You marvel
What’s a tall person’s worst fear?
Ceiling fans.
Why is it always a good idea to wear ‘tall pants’?
Because it’s a practice of good high-jean!
Someone told me, “You are so tall. How did you get inside without hitting your head?”
I replied, “The door.”
Tall People Jokes and Comebacks
The ideal way to respond to a joke with a stranger or with your friends is through a comeback. Make sure to go through all the jokes because we have covered a wide range of tall people jokes with tall people comebacks.
It’s nice how easy it is for us to check each other out across the room. We should go sit down somewhere though so the next tallest people have a chance.
“Wow, you are tall, do you play basketball?”
“Do you play mini golf? or You are so short, are you a jockey?”
What is 8 feet tall, lives in the woods and has a curly tail.
Pigfoot.
Why didn’t the tall guy get into the graveyard?
He wasn’t under six feet.
When you miss a ball in a sport, and everyone’s excuse for you to catch it is because you’re so tall.
I’m six-foot-six and everything is in proportion.
My driver’s license says six foot eight, but morally I’m only five-six.
Do you know why most supermodels are really tall?
Because if they can look good in the outfit, anyone can.
When your above-average friends complain about their height problems before quickly adding, “But you’re even taller than me so it must be even worse for you!”
John said, “You are so tall, how’s the weather near your face.”
I replied, “You will find out if you grow up.”
Are your parents tall as well?
No, but do you need a step ladder in order to hug yours or are they short asses too.
Do you hear, John, do you know what I’ve always wondered? How do tall people like you sleep when it’s clear that no blanket can cover them properly, from neck to toe?
The friend responds nervously: Are you completely crazy? It’s 3 in the morning!
So you can’t sleep? Is it because of the blanket?
What’s the most popular past time for tall women?
Having cat fights other over men who are just as tall as them.
Do you believe in God? I heard that God expresses his disappointment by making the sinners taller people.
No I don’t believe in god, but you remind me of the 8th dwarf that no one remembers or cares about.
Tall People Jokes for Friends
Got bored of all the cliché tall jokes? Well, then keep the ball rolling because this hub has got a bunch of jokes for tall guys to help the short people out. Explore all the jokes with their comebacks and be sure to comment your feedback in the comments below!
You are so tall that when you break your leg, you have to use ladders as crutches.
What do you call a tall, muscular Irishman with a temper that you shouldn’t mess with?
Liam Malone.
Why are tall men attracted to short women?
All you know is that extremes are said to attract.
A short person walks into a bar and his tall friend trips over it.
You can never trust tall people…
They always think they’re above everyone else.
You can never buy clothes without trying then on first, and the few shops that carry tall sizes only carry them online.
How do you tell a tall person on the internet?
Don’t worry, they’ll bring it up no matter the context.
Didn’t your mother tell you not to be long.
The other day I Googled tall people. Funny thing was, Google only showed results for dumb people.
Yo mama so tall when she plays basketball, she has to lie down to put the ball in the hoop.
What? You’ll have to talk louder! I can’t hear you up here.
You don’t need to turn your back if you want to avoid a tall person. You can just walk straight in front of him without ever being caught.
A man once taunted a guy for being tall. He simply showed his driving license and said, “My license shows it’s six-foot-tall but don’t worry, I am just five feet taller than you.”
You are so tall that when you go get a haircut, the hairdresser needs to pack oxygen.
How does an Irishman find his sheep in the tall grass?
Very satisfying!
When you have to buy something the next size up just so the sleeves are long enough. When you are still taller than your friends that are wearing heels.
Why don’t tall women paint their toe nails?
Because they are too far away.
Funniest Tall People Jokes
These funniest tall people jokes are the perfect antidotes if you have ever got mocked due to your short height. Get your hands on the jokes jotted down below and be prepared for some hilarious responses.
You’re so tall that when you go swimming in the middle of the ocean, you only end up wading.
Yo mama so tall she tripped over a rock and hit her head on the moon.
Tall people look like slinkies when they run.I have a new girlfriend who is very thin, tall and has a bright red head.
We met on Match.com.
Relationship goals between a tall and a short person:
Babe, will you please get me something from the top shelf?
Yes, but only if you get me something from bottom shelf.
Why are tall people always so well rested?
Because they sleep longer in bed.
Once upon a time, there lived a king who was only 12 inches tall…
He was a terrible king, but he made a great ruler.
If I’m dating a girl it doesn’t matter how short she is, but if I’m dating a guy he’s supposed to be taller than me.
As a tall person…
Study finds that shorter men will live longer but taller men have a higher shelf life.
Yo mama so tall she tripped on a rock and hit the moon.
What did the tall person say to the short person? What?
Guys telling you that you are taller than you actually are because they are “6 foot” and you are taller than them.
How does one’s height affect their sleep?
Taller people sleep longer in bed.
You’re so tall that when you went to the zoo, a giraffe asked you to get married.
A cheesy pick-up line:
I always liked tall girls. They are worth the climb.
Have you heard the one about the dwarf who abuses his tall wife?
It’s a little offensive. But a real knee slapper.
Where do tall people find significant others?
Usually behind the tall store where you will also find them weeping.
How do you make a tall person angry?
Pick them up in a smart car.
Tall People Jokes That Will Make You Laugh
If you are looking for excellent tall jokes and puns that you can use to entertain your friends, family, or strangers, then read on to enjoy the funniest jokes about being tall available on the internet.
The best part about being this tall is that it is easy to see cute girls like you in a crowd.
Did you hear what happened to the tall man who tried to hang himself?
He is fine, he couldn’t find anything tall enough to tie the rope to.
If your students are too tall, just go into a brighter room.
Your pupils will get smaller.
You’re so tall that when you do selfies with your friends you have to go 5 feet away in the back to enter in the photo.
What’s the difference between a 5 foot-tall person and a 6-foot-tall person?
One person has an extra foot of height, and the other has a brain.
Seriously, if you are short, please marry a tall person, I’m tired of changing bulb for my neighbour and her husband.
Oh so you saw a tall guy with a suit.It must have been the Slender Man for sure.
Yo momma so tall, she’s the only one that can put Clifford the Big Red Dog on a tight leash.
What do tall people and Bode Miller have in common?
They both look like they’re wearing skis.
To the person behind me in class: Sorry if the teacher marks you absent.
I just got thrown out of my local park for arranging the squirrels by height. They didn’t like my critter sizing.
A guy says to the bartender “Give me something tall, cold and full of gin.”
The drunk on the next stool turn angrily and says “Be careful. You are speaking about the woman I love.”
Can you tell the difference between a tall person and a broom?
At least a broom is useful.
Stretching and accidentally hitting the ceiling fan blades while on.
The automatic assumption that since you’re the tallest in a group, you are also the oldest.
Is it hard to find a boyfriend being that tall?
I’m the kind of lady that is put on a pedestal, without actually needing a pedestal.
Final Thoughts on Tall People Jokes
Unless you’re good at cracking jokes, you cannot notice that you can make fun of anyone, including all the giant, leggy people with tall jokes.
Since it’s really common to target short people and joke about them, people don’t really consider how they could be exploiting someone’s insecurities.
But, with that being said, the truth is that life isn’t always easy for tall people too.One can always make a comeback with some tall people jokes and turn the joke on them with a poker face.
As we have always seen tall people bumping their heads on stuff, stubbing their lengthy toes, and forgetting about ever finding shoes that fit there in a regular store, tall person jokes can be a fun way to have a good laugh with them without being offensive.
Therefore, if you ever come across a person who is not getting enough of the short people jokes, go tell them on their face that; “Your lack of height is inTallerable.” To all the tall folks, we are coming for you! (kidding).
Have a good day with these tall people jokes!
