Jokes

154 Hilarious Orphan Jokes That Will Make You Laugh and Think

Making orphan jokes might sound a little offensive, well some people have a distinct sense of humor.

While many people think orphan jokes are ignorant, intolerable and hurtful, we still have people who may laugh hard when someone cracks orphan jokes.

If you are one of those people who enjoy a good laugh while making an orphan joke, no judgement from our side. We are here to help you find your best orphan joke in this blog.

These jokes are not for you if you find such humor dark and off-putting. But, if you want to make a dull time fun with friends entertaining, then these jokes are for you.

Here are some savage, funny and messed up jokes about orphans for your entertainment.

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Best Orphan Jokes

Looking for the best orphan jokes to laugh with your friends? This category will fulfill your need for a good laugh on orphanage jokes. What are you waiting for? Dive right in!

I made a website for orphans.
Unfortunately, it doesn’t have a home page.


Why did the orphan go to church?
So he had someone to call Father


What do blind kids and orphans have in common
Neither of them can see their parents.


Why do orphans play gta
So they can be wanted


Why are orphans bad at poker?
They don’t know what a full house is.


What do you call an orphan who grows up to become a priest?
Father Les.


Dad: I’m taking your toys to the orphanage.
Child: But why?
Dad: Because you’re going to need them there.


Why was the orphan so successful?
When they told him go big or go home, he only had one option.


A boy is about to be sentenced for killing his parents.
He begs the judge to spare his life.
The judge asks for one good reason he should be shown any mercy.
The boy replies, “I’m an orphan, your honor.”


What’s the only other advantage of being an orphan?
The teacher can’t give you homework.


My ex was orphan as a child.
I should have taken that as the first sign.
If her parents didn’t want her, why would I?


Why can orphans travel around so much?
They never get homesick


Why was the orphan walking through the neighborhood?
Idk either it’s not like he has a home to go too.


How do orphans have a family reunion?
They look in the mirror.


Do want to know why they call it an orphanage?
Cause they couldn’t call it orphans home.


What do you do when you see a sad orphan?
Nothing let them wait for their parents.


How do you know when an orphan is lying.
When they say I swear on my mother’s life

Funny Orphan Jokes

This category has all the funny orphan jokes you need for a good laugh. This article has some of the funniest orphan jokes for you to giggle with your friends.

Why was the Orphans first phone a IphoneX?
Because it didn’t have a home button


What show does an orphan hate?
Family Guy.


If you’re ever bored, punch an orphan. what are they gonna do? tell their parents?


Being an orphan isn’t all bad. On the bright side, all your snacks are family sized.


Why are there only 363 days in an orphans calendar
They don’t have fathers or Mother’s Day


Doctor: I’m going to have to turn you away.
Orphan: But why?
Doctor: Because I’m a family doctor.


What does an orphan call a family photo?
A selfie


What’s the only advantage of being an orphan?
Nobody makes jokes about yo mamma.


What’s the difference between Pikachu and an orphan?
Pikachu, I choose you!!!


Why do orphans love boomerangs?
Because they actually come back.


What is an orphan’s favorite beer?
Fosters.


As siblings we always joke about being adopted it stops being funny when your playing in your parents room and find both of your adoption papers.


Why do orphans hate going to costco because they need a parent to get samples.


Q:What the orphan’s favorite part of a website.
A:The Homepage.


What’s an orphan’s favorite spiderman movie?
Spiderman No Way Home


What’s an orphans high school nickname
Lone stone


Why can’t orphans play online games.
Because they don’t have parents to sign them up

Hilarious Orphan Jokes

Want to laugh hysterically until your stomach hurts and you are out of breath? Well, search no more for you have found your place. Here are some hilarious orphan jokes for you.

Judge: We shall now sentence you for the murder of your parents.
Accused: Please consider a lenient sentence, your honour.
Judge: But why?
Accused: Because I’m an orphan.


Did you know? The letter ‘f’ in orphan stands for family.


What do you call a virgin from Alabama?
An orphan.


Why did the orphan become a prostitute?
They wanted someone to call daddy


What’s an orphan’s least favorite type of music?
House.


How do you make an orphans hands bleed?
Tell him to clap until his parents come home.


Did you hear about the orphans that got their Christmas presents stolen?
I heard it was the second worst thing that ever happened to them.


What’s the difference between a parentless child and someone who is fond of unprocessed metals?
One is an orphan and the other is an ore fan.


Where did the orphans go after the orphanage blew up?
Everywhere.


I recently became the coach of an orphanage baseball team
Because I hate dealing with parents.


My wife opened one of her birthday presents early, saying that it was “practically screaming out at her”
That’s the last time I buy her an orphan


What did one orphan say to the other?
Robin, get in the Batmobile!


Why do orphans like Batman?
They are 50% like him.


A teacher asked his students a math question. “You have one dollar. Your parents give you five dollars. How much money do you have?”
After some thinking, about half the class raised their hands. The teacher called on a little girl in the front.
“One dollar!” she said


An orphan walks into a supermarket, gets lost calls for his mum then remembers.


An orphan is like marriage. the kid is always the reason for divorce. the kid always the reason for his parents leaving him.

Good Orphan Jokes

Are you looking for good orphan jokes that are a little less offensive and more funny? This is the right category for you. Here are some good orphan jokes for your enjoyment.

Why do orphans become criminals?
To know what it’s like to be Wanted.


What kind of flour do orphans use to bake bread?
Self-raising


My dad used to say, “Marry an orphan…
Then you’ll be marrying the whole family.”


Welcome to daves orphanage. You make it We take it.


Why do orphans play Minecraft
So they can at least build a home


People call me a bad person but just the other day I saw a little kid crying and asked him where were his parents, I love working at the orphanage.


An orphanage got robbed yesterday, let’s just say that’s the second worst thing to happen to those orphans. At least they didn’t end up like their parents.


Why do I only date orphans?
Because they never have daddy issues.


Why do Orphans play Sims?
because they can make themselves a family.


I told kids to make a family tree. God, I love working at the orphanages.


Orphans are funny cuz all they do is sing “we are family”


Orphans are really out here taking selfies. Nah bro that’s a family photo.


What did the orphan say to the crippled man.
I suffer from crippling depression

One Liner Orphan Jokes

Want to destroy them with a single line? Orphan jokes one liners will help you be that savage joke cracker who destroys people with their one liner jokes in seconds.

Did you know the letter F in orphan stands for family?


You can beat up orphans what are they gonna do, tell their parents?


I wish I could kill my family but you realize you’re an orphan.


Why do orphans like getting kidnapped Because someone actually wants them.


One day an orphan bought a boomerang and he threw it and it didn’t come back.


Knock knock. orphan: who’s there? not your parents.


Dark humor jokes about orphans are funny bc no parents are gonna be told.


I feel sad for orphans they can’t watch Star Wars bc its parental guidance.


There is an upside to being an orphan… every bag of chips is family size


April fools joke about going to an orphanage and telling them their parents came back.


When someone calls you to say this, Hi Welcome to Dave’s Orphanage, You make them We take them how may I help you!


What do you call an orphans family tree A stump?


Well I’m off too the orphanage to tell yo mama jokes.


Why can’t orphans go on an away trip?
Because they already are on one.


Can orphans eat at a family restaurant?


Why do orphans want to be communist?
So they would have a motherland.

Dark Orphan Jokes

This category of dark jokes about orphans is for you if you understand dark wit. Make these dark humor orphan jokes in front of people who have the same sense of humor as you.

What is an orphan’s least favorite song?
We are Family.


Why do orphans have water with their cereal?
Because their dad never came back with the milk.


What’s the difference between an orphan and an apple?
Apples get picked.


Why don’t orphans play hide and seek?
Because no one will look for them.


What did the catholic priest say to the other catholic priest as they entered the orphanage?
Let’s us prey.


What is the similarities of an orphan and a newborn plant?

Both their parents were seperated.


Girl: come over orphan: I can’t
Girl: my parents aren’t home 😉
orphan: oh cool something we have in common.


Why did the orphan not have a girlfriend?
Because he thought that she would leave him to.


A girl and dog get dropped off at an orphanage why was she crying before she went in because the people came back for their dog.


I asked an orphan where his parents were and I also said that i promised to take him to them.
Orphan. there dead
Me. a promise made is a promise kept.


Common man, give the orphans a break with these jokes
No, not until their parents pick them up.


What is an orphan family portrait called?
A self portrait.


What’s missing in an orphanage computer?
The mother board


Why can’t the orphan play the game of life?
They don’t know what a family road trip is.


Why is orphan so scared of the dark?
They don’t have a dad to check the closet.

Offensive Orphan Jokes

Here are some our examples of offensive jokes about orphans. When you want to be daring and humorous at the same time, crack these offensive orphan jokes and make someone think about their life.

What’s an orphan’s least favorite movie?
Meet the Parents.


Why don’t orphans get offended by these jokes?
They don’t hit home.


Why cant orphans do homework?
They dont have a home to do it at.


What’s the difference between puppies and orphans?
The puppies actually get adopted


What’s an orphan’s least favorite store?
Home Depot.


What’s the difference between a clock and an orphan’s dad?
The clock comes back around.


What is an orphan’s favorite event?
Homecoming.


Why can’t an orphan go to mcdonalds theres no point in the words happy meal.


Why can’t orphans go on school field trips?
Parent Signature: _______


How do orphans have a family reunion?
They use a Ouija board.


Orphan boy: Your dad is probably disappointed of you I mean look at you.
Me: well at least my parents kept me. Where’s yours?


Guys, we should stop making jokes about orphans, their parents will get mad. Oh…Wait…Continue.


What type of cookie has an orphan never had?
Homemade cookies.


Teacher: You can’t be here after school without a parent!
Orphan: -no response


If an orphan was spiderman which movie would he be in
No way home.

Messed Up Orphan Jokes

Some jokes are messed-up for sure. If you have a messed-up sense of humor, we might have something for you (no judgements from our side). Here are some messed-up orphan jokes about orphans for your laughter.

Me: Are you an orphan?
Orphan: Yes, what gave me away?
Me: Your parents.


Why can’t orphans work at S.C Johnson
Cause it’s a family company


I don’t see how me exercising will stop children from losing their parents.
But people keep telling me it helps end orphans.


Why is an empty champagne bottle like an orphan?
Because it has lost its pops.


Why aren’t orphan jokes funny?
The punchline isn’t apparent.


Why can’t orphans be on a football team?
because they won’t know where to go for a home game.


How to get quick cash?
Step 1: Kill a child’s parents.
Step 2: Do foster care for them.
Step 3: Get paid for doing foster care.


What is the difference between a boomerang and a orphans dad?
The boomerang comes back.


Kid: “I wish I could be like Batman!”
Genie: “Wish granted!”
When the kid gets home, both of his parents are dead.


One day I saw a kid sitting on the curb dressed in rags. I asked if he was an orphan he said “Yeah what gave me away” I said his parents


Why is it when women decided to kill an unborn baby it’s a “CHOICE” but when I decide to drive my F-150 into a playground full of kids it’s called “MURDER”!


Tell a dark joke to an orphan then hit them
They’ll get the punchline right away


Cemetery should be built next to orphanages, so the orphans can see their parents.


Why do orphans hate milk?
Cause their family is still shopping for it!


Why can’t orphans learn about Ancient Egypt?
Because they won’t know what a mummy is.

Funniest Orphan Jokes

You want to be funny and a little bit offensive at the same time but don’t know how? We will tell you how to have a savage humor. These are some of the funniest orphan jokes for you.

What do you call an orphan’s family reunion?
Me time.


I saw a child crying yesterday so I asked him where his parents were. Bad move. I got fired from my job at the orphanage.


Why don’t orphans work as computer repair technicians?
Because they can’t find the motherboard.


What’s an orphan’s favorite band?
Foster the People.


An orphan boy at my school did really bad in a test and started crying.
I said, “Don’t worry, your parents won’t say anything.”


What do you call a fish with no parents?
An orfin


There’s going to be a wild party at the orphanage tonight. …
The parents aren’t home.


Never tell an Orphan about a family matter,
they wouldn’t understand.


What’s big, bounces, and makes little kids cry?
My donation check to the orphanage.


Where do all the orphan chickens end up?
Foster Farms


Q: How does E.T have an advantage over orphans?
A: E.T can actually phone home


So there’s an orphan in a hospital and the doctor walks up and says “sorry kid but this is a family hospital”


What’s the difference between an orphan and a watermelon? One of them is fun to hit with a sledge hammer and the other one is just a watermelon.


Why did the orphan commit mass murder?
To be on top of the wanted list


Boy and girl playing hide and seek…
Girl: I found you.
Boy: what gave me away?
Girl: your parents obviously.

Orphan Jokes That Will Make You Laugh

We guarantee these jokes for orphans will make you laugh a little harder. You will find yourself cackling your way through these jokes. Dive right in and see for yourself.

Why do orphans like playing tennis?
Because it’s the only love they get.


Why do some couples make their status “single” after a small argument? Like I don’t put “orphan” after I get into an argument with my family.


What is the difference between a prince, a bald headed man, a monkey and an orphan?
The first is an heir apparent, the second has no apparent hair, the third has hairy parent and the last has nary a parent.


New Teacher: I was an orphan as a kid.
Students: OOF
Teacher: Is anyone missing.
Students: Your Parents


So I’m riding in the car with my dad and all of a sudden I smell something rank without warning.
My dad starts laughing at me.
Dad: “Son! That must have been an orphan fart! You know why?”
Me: “Why dad?”
Dad: “Because it ain’t got no pop!”


What movie does an orphan want for Christmas?
Spiderman homecoming


What do you call a black child with 2 dads?
An Orphan


Orphan- I want to kill my parents
People- I dont think you have the facilities for that big man


Kid: Hey, are you an orphan?
Friend: Yea. But you are too.
Kid: At least my parents wanted me.


Last night I burned down an orphanage there was one survivor who said I would regret it I said “what are you gonna do, tell your parents?”


Why can’t an orphan get suspended or expelled from school?

Because they need to contact parents.


You tell an orphan joke to an orphan you start laughing they start crying they say they are going to tell their mom then you start laughing harder.


The orphan: why don’t my parents love me?
Me: because you don’t have any.


Why are Orphans so bad at dodgeball
Because no one misses them.


Everyone loves orphans,
other than their parents of course.

Final Thoughts on Orphan Jokes

If you have read the whole article, I guess you appreciate orphan jokes. Make sure you understand the brutality of jokes about orphans when you make one.

You can make orphan jokes in front of your friends when you are in mood to offend. Remember, not everyone understands dark humor so be responsible for your words.

It is always preferable to be mindful of your jokes because your entertainment may come at the cost of hurting people without a family. You can take inspiration from the above jokes and make a joke by yourself.

You will find this article helpful as it contains every sort of orphan jokes, such as, dark humor jokes about orphans, offensive jokes, messed-up jokes, funny jokes and the best orphan jokes on the internet.

But please be mindful of the people without parents as you will leave them crying with no mommy to comfort them.

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