Jokes

154 Hilarious Fruit Jokes That A-peels to Everybody

Who doesn’t love some juicy fruits? Everyone, we guess! And these fruit jokes are no exception, to quench your thirst.

The traditional jokes about fruits have been a source of amusement since ancient times and they are quite ap-peech-iated by the people. We normally share these with friends and family during lunch or dinner, but it’s also fun to sit back and enjoy the fruit-based comedy on your own.

As a matter of fact, we have jotted down the latest fruit jokes in this blog post for you to enjoy and spend some quality time with your loved ones which you might have been missing these days due to daily life hustle.

Send your troubles away and face the day without running out of energy! Encourage someone with a few sweet fruit jokes to remind them of their awesomeness.

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Best Fruit Jokes

Good fruit jokes are hard to find, especially the ones which a-peels you on the moment. Thus, below are the best fruit jokes written, for you to enjoy and bring a smile on other’s faces as well.

Why did the worm leave the apple?
Because Noah said to travel in pairs!


Why is it so difficult to work at an apple pie factory?
They have such a high turnover rate!


What do you get when you put an iPhone in a blender?
Apple juice!


What do you get when you cross apple pie with a Christmas tree?
Pineapple pie!


Why did the apple pie cross the road?
It saw a fork up ahead!


Why did the apple pie go to the dentist!
Because it needed a filling!


What’s worse than finding a worm in your apple?
Finding half a worm!


How do you make an apple turnover?
You push it down the hill!


What do you call an apple that plays the trumpet?
A tooty fruity!


Why don’t robots like apples?
They’re androids!


Why did the man get fired from the orange juice factory?
He just couldn’t concentrate!


Last night I dreamt I was swimming in an ocean of orange lemonade, it was a Fanta-sea!


Why are oranges the fastest fruit?
They never run out of juice!


I just found out I’m colourblind… That diagnosis came completely out of the orange!


I’ve got a great idea for an orange peeling machine, I hope it bears fruit!

Funny Fruit Jokes

Are you seeking some funny fruit jokes? Well, then keep the ball rolling because these funny jokes will get you on the floor laughing. Take a quick look and relish your summers with these juicy jokes.

Orange is a great fruit, it’s citrically acclaimed!


Why do oranges do so well in school?
They concentrate!


What do you call a bunch of strawberries playing instruments together?
A jam session!


Which fruit always feels sad?
A blue-berry!


Why can’t you make a crumble with 3.14 blackberries?
Because that would be a pie!


How do you fix a broken berry?
With a strawberry patch!


A lorry full of berries crashed on the motorway, it’s created a huge jam!


What’s a scarecrow’s favourite fruit! Straw-berries!


I went to the doctor because I had a strawberry growing out of my ear, he gave me some cream for it!


How did the fruit basket get across the lake?
They took the straw-ferry!


Why do oranges wear sun cream?
Because their skin peels!


How many marmalade sandwiches did Paddington Bear eat? None, he’s already stuffed!


What kind of monkey doesn’t eat bananas?
An orangutan!


What was Prince’s favourite dessert?
Raspberry sorbet!


Why are grapes always so unhappy, they’ve got nothing to wine about!

Hilarious Fruit Jokes

We’ve got some berry amusing fruit jokes that are ideal for youngsters! It’s difficult to get youngsters to eat nutritious foods, so why not include some fruit jokes to keep them engaged? So take a gander at these hilarious fruit jokes.

Lemons and limes fight all the time, they are bitter rivals!


I went to the shop today to get lemons and limes but they didn’t have any. It was a fruitless trip!


What did the lemon say to the lime?
Sour you doing?!


Why did the lemon cross the road?
He wanted to play squash!


Why did the lemon go to the doctor?
He was feeling sour!


What did the fruit say when he was surprised for his birthday?
Wow… I’m s-peach-less!


Where do baby apes go to sleep?
In an apricot!


What is Dracula’s favourite fruit?
Neck-tarines!


What do you call the time in-between eating a load of peaches?
A pit stop!


Did you hear about the fruit that gave people a warm fuzzy feeling?
It was a real peach!


What pie did the scientists use for their experiment?
A peach tree dish!


What do you give a sick lemon?
Lemon-Aid!


What do you call a cat who eats lemons?
A sourpuss!


Where do baby citrus fruits go to learn?
A lemon tree school!


What does a lemon say when it wants a hug?
Give us a squeeze!


Why were the chefs shaving peaches?
Because they needed nectarines for the recipe!


Why was the peach late to work?
He had to make a pit stop on the way!

Knock Knock Fruit Jokes

Truth to be told; we can never get tired of knock knock jokes. So, if you are in search of quality knock knock fruit jokes, then look below because we have updated this with the newest collection.

Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Orange.
Orange who?
Orange you going to let me in?

 
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Orange.
Orange who?
Orange you glad to see me?

 
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Bean.
Bean who?
Bean a while since I’ve seen you!


Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Olive.
Olive who?
Olive you. Do you love me too?

Fruit Jokes One Liners

If you are not full of fruity jokes yet, we have more fruit jokes one liners to fulfill your hunger. So lean back while you relax and chuckle at these amazing jokes!

I told my son about the health benefits of eating dried fruits.
It’s all about raising awareness.


What do you call the time between eating a load of peaches?
A pit stop.


Thanks! I ap-peach-iate it.


Thank you berry much.


Thanks a melon.


Thanks a bunch.


Kiwi be friends?


It takes two to mango.


You’re my main squeeze.


Orange you glad we’re friends?


I’m grapeful for our friendship.


Thank you! I apple-solutely appreciate it.


Some fruits turn into other fruits. For example, wait long enough and blueberries will turn into elder berries.


What fruit always feels sad?
A blue-berry.


Why did the orange stop?
Because it ran out of juice.


Why did the apples get a divorce?
They weren’t a very good pear.


Why was the baby strawberry sad?
Because its parents were in a jam.

Clean Fruit Jokes

The Internet is full of dirty stuff these days and even jokes and even jokes are not clean most of the time. Yet, we have managed to gather a couple of clean fruit jokes to share with your family.

What did the daddy tomato say when his child was falling behind on their walk?
Ketchup!


Why did the tomato go to the ball with a prune?
Because he couldn’t find a date!


Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit, wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad!


Why did the cantaloupe jump into the swimming pool?
He wanted to be a watermelon!


A guy kept trying to sell me tropical fruit. I told him mango!


What did the watermelon say to the cantaloupe?
You’re one in a melon!


What did the pitted fruit say when he got in a fight?
You want a peach of me?!


What do you call a piece of art made by a fruit?
A masterpeach!


What did the fruit say to his valentine?
I love you from my head tomato!


You may think I’m crazy for eating ham and pineapple sandwiches but hey, that’s just Hawaii roll!


What do you call a snake made out of pineapple?
Ananas-conda!

Fruit Jokes for Adults

Everyone enjoys fruits, especially when they are freshly picked. We are all aware that fruits are important for a healthy body. Thus, all those adults who choose fruits over any other thing, we bet you can’t find any better fruit jokes for adults than these. Take a look!

Girl! You’re the apple of my eye.


If you’re a fruit?
Then you’d be grapes cause your grapes are sour.


Ahhh, Baby!
Your ass reminds me of the melons of my Orchard.


You are as tangled as fruit salad because I could never understand you.


Girls are as unpredictable as apple…
Because it could be sweet or bitter from inside.


Dear! Aren’t you spicy?
Cause you make my heartburn.


Sweetheart, why you speak so acrid?
Are you eating bitter gourd?


Hey babes!
You’d be a sensual lip like a red strawberry.


If you and I were a fruit, then you’d be a fine apple, and I’d be your banana, and we together could produce pears.


Hey, hot pepper!
Would you like to lick my banana?


Why I’m feeling thirst?
I think I just need your delicious melons juice.


Darling!
If you’d be a fruit, you must be a date cause I loved to eat a date.


How do you fix a broken tomato?
Use tomato paste.


Two fruit flies are out on a date. One says to the other: “This date is amazing.” The other replies: “Yeah, but it’s already half-eaten.”


I went to the doctor because I had a strawberry growing out of my ear. He gave me some cream for it.


What’s Dracula’s favorite fruit?
Neck-tarines.


I asked my wife: “Did you know there’s a fruit you can eat that provides your daily requirement of potassium?”
My wife: “That’s bananas.”
Myself: “I know. I couldn’t believe it either.”

Fruit Jokes Pick Up Lines

You might have not come across such a category before, but fruit jokes pick up lines are actually the funniest thing you have read in a while. Hence, take a break from all the tasks and avail yourself with the puns.

I’m bananas for you, let’s never split.


Sorry I’m bad at pickup limes.


You’ve got a peach of my heart.


I cherry-ish you.


Lime all yours.


You hold the kiwi to my heart.


You’re grape.


You are cherry sweet.


Wanna hear my best pickup lime?


Hey drop me a lime!


You can call me any lime.


You’re plum-perfect.


You’re hard core.


You’re a peach.


You’re one in a melon.


No fig deal, you got this!


That’s it! I’ve got to draw the lime.


All in due lime.


Don’t worry, just let it mango.


You’re pear-fect.


Be like a pineapple – always wear your crown.


I miss you berry much.


Honeydew you know how happy you make me?


You are juice the cutest.


If you were a fruit, you’d be a fine-apple.


I love you cherry much.


I find you very ap-peel-ing.


We make a great pear.


You’re the apple of my eye.

Fruit Jokes and Puns

Collecting berry best fruit jokes and puns can actually be hard. But, you don’t have to distress about that because we have got your back with the following jokes. Utilize these in ordinary conversation, on a greeting card, or in your amusing Instagram captions.

Squeeze the day.


A fruitful discussion.


Draw the lime.


Get juiced to it.


Pit of despair.


Fruit yourself.


No fig deal.


Let it mango.


I’m not peeling well.


It’s very a-peel-ing.


Pick of the bunch.


Just pear-fect.


A fresh pear of eyes.


Neither here nor pear.


A-pear-antly not.


A peach of my heart.


Practice what you peach.


Made for peach other.


I ap-peach-iate it.


I apple-solutely understand.


Sit down be-cider.


Apple-y ever after.


The apple of my pie.


One in a melon.


Feeling a little melon-choly.


Honeydew you know how much I love you?
Don’t be melon-dramatic.

Final Thoughts on Fruit Jokes

Now, that you have gone through multiple jokes under different categories, you must be surprised, at how hilarious they can be. Fruit jokes are an excellent way to liven things up and make your pals laugh.

These witty jokes are hilarious, imaginative, and appropriate for any occasion! Also, you don’t even need to be a professional comedian or a comic genius to crack these jokes about fruits; all you need is a decent sense of humor and some juicy fruits as well.

We all are perfectly aware of the benefits of consuming fruits on daily basis. However, we should also know that a daily dose of good fruit jokes is equally essential to keep your body healthy and energetic.

Therefore, get your hands on these freshly picked fruit jokes and share them with your buddies, before they get rotten. Also, if you know any fruit puns, feel free to drop them in the comments.

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