151 Hilarious Tomato Jokes That Are So Juicy
Tomato jokes are very funny and delicious as they sound. Not simply because they are juicy, tomatoes are the greatest fruit. In disguise, they are also everyone’s favorite fruit. This indicates that a tomato can perform every task that a fruit can, but better.
Just as tomatoes make every meal delicious and delicious, the jokes of tomatoes make every party delicious, fun, and fragrant. Just as food without tomatoes is inauspicious, jokes without tomatoes are inauspicious.
Everyone knows that tomatoes are the funniest of all the fruits. Share these tomato jokes with your family members to get the maximum enjoyment out of them. Tomatoes look beautiful and appealing.
Tomatoes are the essence of every dish. Just like red tomatoes decorate our dish, the jokes about tomatoes melt everyone’s hearts. You can win the hearts of your loved ones by telling jokes about tomatoes.
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Table of Contents
Best Tomato Jokes
Just as our food is flavorless without tomatoes, our jokes are equally flavorless without tomato jokes. So, for now, we advise you to just start reading our tomato jokes. With our best tomato jokes, if you notice your cheeks getting red, don’t freak out.
What’s the difference between knowledge and wisdom?
Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
Does Santa like to grow tomatoes?
YES — he gets to hoe, hoe, hoe!
What is red and goes up and down?
A tomato in an elevator.
Why did Mrs. Tomato turn red?
She saw Mr. Green Pea over the back fence.
What did the papa tomato say to the baby tomato?
“Hurry and ketchup!”
Why did the tomato go out with a prune?
Because he couldn’t find a date.
How do you fix a sliced tomato?
Use tomato paste.
Why did the tomato blush?
Because he saw the salad dressing.
What did the macaroni say to the tomato?
“Don’t get saucy with me!”
Funny Tomato Jokes
As tomatoes are so juicy so do their jokes. As tomatoes make our food delicious as do their jokes. Please take a moment to read some funny tomato jokes that have been compiled below; we are sure that you’ll find them very entertaining.
After the first watering of Arnold Schwarzenegger’s tomato seeds, what did he say to them?
You have been germinated.
What is the best way to fix a broken tomato?
With tomato paste.
What is the tomato’s greatest desire?
A jerrymato.
Is there anything Bacon said to Tomato?
Lettuce get together!
How do you describe a tomato with a trumpet?
A tooty fruity.
What do boats eat with a spoon?
Tomato sloop!
What caused Mrs Tomato to turn red?
Suddenly, she saw Mr. Green Pea!
Tomates love dances, so what’s their favorite?
Salsa!
Why a tomato round and red?
If it were long and green, it would be a cucumber!
Do tomatoes and potatoes have anything in common?
Toes.
I think my neighbour is growing tomatoes in his car…
He’s been sat in there with a hose through the window for hours!
A tomato walks into a bar and asks for a drink…
The bartender says, “Sorry, we don’t serve food here.”
Put some lettuce, sliced tomatoes, cucumber in front of a chicken, what does it see?
The chicken sees a salad!
A husband and a wife sit at the table, having dinner. The woman drops a bit of tomato sauce on her white top. “Och, I look like a pig!”
The man nods, “And you dropped tomato sauce on your top!”
What caused the bread to knock over the tomato?
Because he loafed him.
The type of tomato that smell best is?
A Roma.
A man threw dough, shredded cheese, and tomato sauce at me to start a fight.
I asked, “You wanna pizza me?”.”
Hilarious Tomato Jokes
Tomatoes make our meals more visually appealing and tasty, just as their jokes do. So, if you want to make your time as amazing as your food, share the hilarious tomato jokes mentioned below with your buddies.
A friend of mine has a unique recipe where he barbeques a tomato with lots of ketchup. He calls this dish the ketchupped steak.
As the ketchup got back from the doctor with his pair of glasses, the mustard joked that his Heize sight must be 20-20 now!
My friend decided to finish the book he had been reading while sipping on some tomato soup. Unfortunately, the soup spilled and spoiled his book. It was indeed a bad time to ketchup on his reading.
Last night, I missed the cooking show teaching how to make a great red tomato soup. Well, I guess I’d have to ketchup the show later.
When the new king in Tomato Town had his coronation ceremony, the other tomatoes bowed down and said, “We are at your service, Your Royal Heinze-ness!”
When the ketchup visited the psychiatrist, the doctor told the ketchup that he mustn’t keep his feelings bottled up.
When a tomato gets be-Heinze schedule on work and other things, he must do everything in order to ketchup.
The only way a tomato can eat noodles is by the help of the ketchup-stick.
When Arnold Schwarzeneggar saw that the tomato was in danger, he yelled at him, “Get to the Ketchupper!”
Could you tell me what the potato told the tomato?
I wonder what’s making you blush, sweetie?
Is there anything red and invisible?
No tomatoes.
When the cucumber and the cabbage got kidnapped by the tomato, what did they say to each other?
Lettuce go.
I decided to add some more tomato ketchup to the soup I was making. Now, in Heinze sight, it does not look like a good idea.
All the vegetables decided to run a marathon. During the race, the red-faced tomato was lagging behind quite a bit. The other vegetables thought that he’ll never be able to ketchup with them.
This great documentary on growing tomatoes and tomato farming gives everyone a unique be-Heinze the scenes look at the tomato industry.
Why is a tomato round and red?
Because if it was long, skinny, and green, it would be a bean.
What did the tomato say to the lettuce?
Lettuce be friends.
How do you get rid of unproductive tomatoes?
Can them.
What did the sergeant tomato tell the slacker soldier tomato?
“You better catch up!”
Knock Knock Tomato Jokes
When you read the following knock-knock tomato jokes, your cheeks will become red, much like your meal would if you added tomatoes to it. When our food becomes red, it seems that it is also having fun with tomatoes. Therefore, please read these knock-knock jokes for amusement.
Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Ketchup.
Ketchup who?
Ketchup and I’ll tell you!
Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Ketchup.
Ketchup who?
Ketchup my slow tomatoes!
Tomato Jokes One Liners
Tomato joke one-liners are hilarious and excellent. Following is a collection of some hilarious Tomato jokes one-liners. You might arrange a competition among your friends about these jokes for fun.
Why was the tomato on a motorbike?
He was trying to ketchup with his friends.
The papa tomato said to the baby tomato, “Son, I love you from my head tomatoes.”
Researchers made an incredible discovery when they put the tomato under an electron microscope. They found a new type of atom- the tomatom.
The guys down at the new vegetable factory have been trying to get everyone hyped up about their new customizable tomato. They call it the customato.
As I walked back home after buying red tomatoes and other vegetables, this young kid drove his cycle over my foot. Boy, I had never had this much pain to-ma-toes.
When the tomato entered the room without knocking, he left red-faced because he had seen the salad dressing.
As I rushed to the hospital with my broken tomato, I asked the doctor if there was any way to fix a broken tomato. He replied that the only way to fix a broken tomato is to use tomato paste.
As part of the sensitivity campaign, the boss tomato made it clear to all the employee tomatoes that under no condition should they fat shame someone in the office by calling them plum tomatoes.
When the gamer got to Tomato Town in Fortnite, his game stopped working. He simply used red tomato paste to fix it.
The doctor tomato decided to get a test done on the baby tomato for flu. Sadly, the kid did have flu but he was asymp-tomato-ic.
When the teacher asked the student where tomatoes came from, she replied, “From the tomato source!”
If a tomato ever travels to a different place with different weather, he must get accustomato the place.
When the teacher asked the tomato what his favorite book was, he said it was “Uncle Tomato’s Cabin”.
I love using ketchup so much that every time I get a hotdog, I au-tomato-cally go for the ketchup.
Recently, the other tomatoes have reported sightings of a vigilante tomato in the town. The local authorities and newspapers have labeled him as The Phantomato.
The best way to punish lazy and careless tomato employees from the office is to can them.
After the tomato traveler had completed his much-publicized trip around the world in just 80 days, he became known to everyone as the globe tomato.
In earlier times, when critics didn’t like a play or a performance, they wouldn’t throw potatoes and other vegetables towards the stage. They would throw ‘Rotten Tomatoes’ at it.
The smallest tomato in the class complained to the teacher tomato because the other tomatoes used to make fun of him by calling him the bottomato.
When the tomato went to the doctor to get his annual health checkup, he asked him, “Please check me thoroughly from my head tomatoes.”
The judge tomato said that she would put all these thug tomatoes in jail if they do not tomatone for their crimes.
In the olden days, when a tomato wanted to confess his sins and crimes, he would simply go to church. The Padre would forgive him and he would turn from a tomato to a tomato pure-e.
How do you fix a broken tomato?
Tomato paste!
What did one tomato say to the other tomato?
You go ahead and I’ll ketchup.
What did the big tomato say to the slow little tomato walking down the road?
Ketchup!
What did the father tomato say to the baby tomato whilst on a family walk?
Ketchup.
What did the tomato say to the other tomato?
You go on without me, I’ll ketchup!
What did the traffic light say to the tomato crossing?
Don’t look now, I’m changing.
What’s a tomato’s favorite dance?
The salsa!
Why is a pea small and green?
Because if it was large and red it would be a tomato!
Why was the tomato blushing?
Because it saw the salad dressing.
Clean Tomato Jokes
If you are feeling so bored or if you are in difficulty then take some time and read these below-mentioned clean tomato jokes, and we guarantee that after reading these jokes you will not be able to stop laughing.
Like ketchup, good things in life come slow and are worth waiting for.
What makes tomatoes the slowest vegetable?
Because they can’t ketchup.
Why did the mayonnaise win the running race?
Because the tomato sauce couldn’t Ketchup.
Two tomatoes are walking across the road when a car drives over one of them.
The other turns around and says “Hurry up ketchup!”
When do you stop making sandwiches on Monday?
When there was no more meat.
Did you hear about the race between the lettuce and the tomato?
The lettuce was ahead and the tomato was trying to ketchup.
Mental illness is on the increase…
At least that’s what the ketchup bottle told me this morning.
Dirty Tomato Jokes
Dirty tomato jokes are the ideal option if you’re in the mood for romance. For your amusement and fun, we’ve collected a few dirty tomato jokes. Don’t forget to tell your sweetheart about these dirty tomato jokes.
My wife asked me to put tomato ketchup on the shopping list that I was writing out.
I can’t read a fucking word now.
Two tomatoes are chilling in the fridge
The first one says “Dang, it’s kind of cold in here”
The second one backs away, and says “Holy shit it’s a talking tomato”
I went to the doctor’s today, with a bright red scab on the head of my dick..
I dropped my trousers for him and straight away he told me it was caused by not eating properly.
“Oh come off it, doc!” I scolded. “You’ve not examined me or even asked about my lifestyle. How the fuck can you just assume I’m not eating properly?”
“It’s a bit of tomato skin.”
Two tomatoes crossed the road..
While they were crossing a speeding car came around the corner.
The second tomato leaped on to the sidewalk and just managed to get out of the way.
The first tomato came up to him and said.
What the fuck dude, you ruined the joke!
Lettuce Tomato
A teenage couple was at the boys house and wanted to have relations. The only problem was, they were sleeping on the top of a bunk bed with the boy’s little brother asleep on the bottom bunk. They came up with a plan, they would say “tomato” for harder and “lettuce” for softer while having sex.
So as they are doing the deed and the girl is saying “Lettuce! Tomato! Lettuce! Tomato!” Then the younger brother says, “Hey, can you two stop making sandwiches? I just got mayonnaise on my face.”
What do you call a really horny tomato farmer with no lube?
Friction till fruition.
A tomato an orange and an apple seed walk into a bar…
The tomato says, “I’ll have a Bloody Mary.”
The orange says, “I’ll have a screwdriver.”
The apple seed says, “oh shit, I didn’t know we were supposed to bring our own juice.”
Tomato Jokes for Adults
Tomato jokes are a favorite of far too many adults and married couples. It is for this reason that I’ve prepared the most diverse collection of tomato jokes for adults; reading them all will make you laugh so much with your partner.
What did the salad dressing say to the tomato?
Don’t look I’m Dressing!
What do tomatoes do when they meet?
The ketchup.
Roses are red tomatoes are redder I think we both know I like you better.
What did the squash say to the tomato?
Ketchup!
The lettuce and tomato where in a race.
The lettuce was a head and the tomato was trying to ketchup
Have ya heard about the awesome fruit race?
The lettuce was ahead but the tomato was able to ketchup!
What do you call a burnt retard
Tomatoe.
Hey amazing people! The Prankster is back! This prank was on my sister and her friends. (tbh I did not think she had friends.)
I set out some snacks for them! Btw (I can’t be trusted).
I gathered some slapies.
The things I gathered were Tomatoes, onions, milk, carrots, ice cream, and some dried out green beans! all that stuff! To the 4.
I need the tomatoes to make a sauce because I am going to put that with the ice cream, mix that up with the milk, yea yea it might look like a gross and nasty dish…WRONG!!! I am going to make it into a little snack…anyway we make that into a snack for her and her friends. The onions are used to make their eye’s cry and burn but I will give them a towl after that. The dried out green beens are just to make them go over the top and overreact because I did not cook them. After that we make it like it’s not so iky!
I feed it to them! They overreacted!
Lettuce: Tomato, you’re doing great!
Tomato: Thanks for the condiment!
A woman went into her garden and danced in front of her vegetables. The next morning, her corn didn’t grow, and the tomatoes didn’t blush or turn red, but the cucumbers grew four inches.
Two tomatoes are walking on a road then car runs over one of them and the other says: hi ketchup!
Why did da tomato blush?!
IT SAW THE SALAD DRESSING YUH
“One silent evening, a man walks to his fridge to get some food. He sets out a fork and napkin on the table. He reaches to grab a salad topped with olives and cheese. He sets the food down on the table and begins to add tomatoes, condiments, and…“He is interrupted. “Why are you saying this aloud?” A young boy asks his father. The father replies with, “You wanted to know how to live on your own. But I guess experience is more helpful,” he says as he rushes the child out of the front door.
We got a. Number one victory royale, yeah Fortnite we boutta get down! Get down! Ten kills on the board right now, just wiped out tomato town! My friend’s gone down, I revived him now we’re heading southbound! Now we’re in the pleasant park street, look at the map, go to the marked sheet!
What do a gay guy in a wheel chair and a tomato have in common?
They’re both a fruit AND a vegetable!
Tomato Jokes for Kids
Children like making tomato jokes with their pals at school because they find tomatoes to be amusing and appetizing. Take some time to go over these tomato jokes for kids; you’ll find them amusing.
If tomatoes are fruit does that mean ketchup is a smoothie!
What do tomatoes learn to do in a race?
Ketchup!
C’mon tomato!
I’m trying to ketchup.
You’re a mile away.
I am a tomato! It’s not that easy for me to ketchup.
Why is a tomato red?
Because it saw the ranch dressing.
“Hotel Rwanda” has a high score on Rotten Tomatoes.
But their Yelp reviews are terrible.
Did you hear the race of the tomato and lettuce?
Well the lettuce was winning and the tomato was trying to ketchup.
What did the tomato say to the empty Ketchup bottle “GOD STAY AWAY FROM ME”.
What do you call an abortion in a bathtub?
Chunky Tomato Soup.
What did the mommy tomato tell the little tomato?
U better ketchup.
Tomato Jokes and Puns
As tomato jokes boost our health similarly to eating tomatoes, I have compiled some tomato jokes and puns for your amusement; please enjoy these puns and jokes and share them with your friends and family.
I seed him eat the tomato just now.
I love you from my head tomatoes!
A cabbage, a tomato, and a nose were racing against each other. The cabbage was ahead, the nose was running, and the tomato was trying to ketchup.
What did Arnold Schwarzenegger say to his tomato seeds after watering them for the first time? You’ve been germinated.
When the tomato went to the doctor to get his annual health checkup, he asked him: “Please check me thoroughly from my head tomatoes.”
I love using ketchup so much that every time I get a hot dog, I au-tomato-cally go for the ketchup. If you like this tomato pun, you’ll also like these hot dog puns.
If tomato is a fruit, then ketchup is a smoothie.
What did the lemon in the salad say to the tomato?
Give me a squeeze.
What’s tomato (the matter) with you?
Tomato (tomorrow) is another day.
Toma-toad – A red veggie that croaks… and is bumpy?
Tom-atom – Tomatoes that are invisible to the naked eye.
I leaf (love) tomatoes like no other!
Here today, gone tomato.
He was asymp-tomato-ic.
To-mato or not to-mato.
I need an au-tomato-ic ketchup dispenser.
Cover up your bottom-ato.
Toma-toes – The little wiggly digits on your mutated veggie.
Tomatoes are absolutely plant-tastic.
Final Thoughts on Tomato Jokes
Tomato jokes are as appealing to everyone as we like tomatoes in pizza. Tomato jokes are suitable and appropriate for every sort of person. They are appropriate for kids as well as adults.
Tomato jokes bring happiness and cuteness to everyone’s face. So, if your friends are angry with you then you can make them happy by telling them tomato jokes because tomato jokes are so interesting and delicious that your friends will laugh and fall in love with you.
Just as tomatoes are suitable for every vegetable and adornment of every meal, tomato jokes should be the adornment of every party and every program, because a party without jokes is pointless just like a meal without tomatoes is pointless.
Simply said, these jokes about tomatoes are amusing. We hope that you would have liked the above-mentioned tomato jokes then do not forget to share these jokes with your loved ones.
