150 Hilarious Sister Jokes to Celebrate the Special Bond

Sister jokes are as lovely as they sound. Sisters are an important part of our life. Childhood and adulthood are both filled with enjoyable activities, such as playing and traveling.

Sisters are always willing to provide a helpful hand, but jokes are much more enjoyable when shared with your sisters.

They are sometimes bothersome. Perhaps a nice joke would be helpful. Let’s partake in this hilarious selection of sister jokes that are guaranteed to make you laugh out loud.

If your sister often makes fun of you, these humorous jokes about sisters are a terrific retort, and I’m sure you’ll like delivering them. Enjoy!

We have gathered a compilation of sister jokes that will provide entertainment and let you appreciate your special bond.

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Best Sister Jokes

The only meal that makes you weep, according to my younger sister, is onions. So, I tossed her a coconut. This is one of the best sister jokes for your entertainment.

My sister hates it when I invade her privacy;
It’s written right here in her diary.


Did the tree say anything to his sister?
Wood you please leaf me alone you son of a birch.


My sister asked me to give her something hard to write on.
I don’t know why she got so mad at me.
Sand is difficult to write on.


My sister recently lost her tongue in a bad accident.
I would like to make a joke about it, but I think it would be very tasteless.


When your sister is crying, what do you say to her?
“Are you in a crisis?”


Although I miss my sister,
I aim to get better.


A few weeks ago, my sister got married and now has 16 husbands.
There are four richer, four poorer, four better, and four worse.


It turns out that Cardi B’s sister is a fitness instructor,
named Cardi O.


Suddenly my sister came up to me and said,
“Mom told me to take the trash out for the rest of the year. Are you free tomorrow?”


My twin sister always takes the stairs, but I prefer the elevator.
I guess we were raised differently.


How did the Redneck locate his sister in the woods?
Attractive.


Sally has 100 sisters, but why does she have so many?
Her home is an orphanage.


What do little sisters like to ride?
A nissan.

Funny Sister Jokes

Have a look at these funny sister jokes which will make you and them laugh to tears! The best part is, you can crack these jokes to them anytime! So let’s get it started!

Sisters are like fat thighs… they stick together.


I smile because you’re my sister. I laugh because there’s nothing you can do about it.


My sister has an awesome sister, true story.


Sisters never quite forgive each other for what happened when they were five.


In the cookies of life, sisters are the chocolate chips.


Is there any difference between my phone and my sister?
I actually give a damn if my phone dies.


What is the procedure for circumcising someone from Alabama?
Kick his sister in the jaw.


I just found out my wife has a twin sister.
I saw her on Tinder.


My twin sister always takes the stairs, but I prefer taking the elevator.
I guess we are raised differently.


What do you call a helpful sister?
Assister.


Did you know Darth Vader has a sister?
Her name is Ella.


I was raised as an only child.
Which really annoyed my sister.


My sister majored in Philosophy.
I saw her sobbing the other day, worried she won’t get a job.


We are sisters. If I am mad at someone, you are mad at them, too. End of story.


If you mess with the big sister, there is always a younger, crazier sister behind her… that’s who you don’t want to mess with!


In the cookies of life, sisters are the chocolate chips.


“More than Santa Claus, your sister knows when you’ve been bad and good.” –Linda Sunshine


“We may look old and wise to the outside world. But to each other, we are still in junior school.” –Charlotte Gray


Middle sister: victim of our older sibling, tormentor of our younger sibling, and somehow, peacekeeper between the both of them.

Hilarious Sister Jokes

One of the strangest and most hilarious sister jokes might be, that my sister just got married, and she now has sixteen spouses. There are four better and four worse, as well as four wealthier and four poorer.

What do you call it when your female sibling goes crazy?
Psycho-sis.


I’ll never forget my sister’s last word. “Is it edible?”


Is it possible to circumcise a hillbilly?
You strike his sister in the jaw.


What do you call a crazy-in-every-way sister?
A sissy.


A sister knows you hide your best chocolate in the bag of broccoli in the freezer. A good sister leaves you a piece. Guess which one I am.


“When sisters stand shoulder to shoulder, who stands a chance against us?” –Pam Brown


“Having a sister is like having a best friend you can’t get rid of. You know whatever you do, they’ll still be there.” –Amy Li


“I’m the big sister. I want to make sure she has everything, even if I don’t have anything. It’s hard. I love her too much. That’s what counts.” –Venus Williams


“A sister can be seen as someone who is both ourselves and very much not ourselves–a special kind of double.” –Toni Morrison


“Is solace anywhere more comforting than that in the arms of a sister?” –Alice Walker


“Acquaintances were always on their best behavior, but sisters loved each other enough to say anything.” –Lauren Weisberger


Acquaintances were always on their best behavior but sisters loved each other enough to say anything. –Lauren Weisberger


“Someone has to know all my passwords so they can delete all my embarrassing pictures in case I die–and you’ve already seen all my birthmarks.”


“If your sister is in a tearing hurry to go out and cannot catch your eye, she’s wearing your best sweater.” –Pam Brown


“You know full well as I do the value of sisters’ affections; there is nothing like it in this world.” –Charlotte Bronte

Brother and Sister Jokes

Being a brother is enjoyable. Together, you quarrel, play, and fight. But in the end, you are still related and will always love one another. So, bring your siblings together and read out this one of the best brother and sister jokes that would make everyone laugh!

I met a brother and sister from Alabama the other day. I swear, if they were any more inbred…
They would be a sandwich.


A girl and her brother are walking in their garden.
Sister: Why are you cutting those flowers?
Brother: because they are beautiful!
Sister: I thought you said you cut yourself because you aren’t.
Brother: …


Guys my sister’s pregnant!
I’m gonna be a dad!


Brother: I can hear you using the vibrator every night, I’m right here if you need help.
Sister: that’s my fu##ing electric toothbrush.
Brother: oh, well the offer still stands.


A brother and a sister always got into fights.
One day the brother tells the sister, “you are adopted.”
The sister yells back, “At least they wanted me!”


If you get married in Mississippi and get divorced in Minnesota …
… are you still brother and sister?


When can a man and a woman have the same last name?
Teenagers: brother and sister
Adults: husband and wife
Alabama: yes


My wife and I got along so much better…
When we were just brother and sister


Peter: My brother wants to work badly!
Anita: As I remember, he usually does!


Do robots have sisters? No, just transistors!


Why does your sister have yeast and shoe polish for breakfast?
Because she wants to rise and shine.


Why did your sister jump out the window?
Because she wanted to try out her new spring suit.


Teacher: What’s this a picture of?
Class: Don’t know, miss.
Teacher: It’s a kangaroo.
Class: What’s a kangaroo, miss?
Teacher: A kangaroo is a native of Australia.
Smallest boy: Wow, my sisters married one of them.


Sister: mom wants you to come in and help fix dinner.
Brother: why? is it broken?


My sister went on a crash diet. Is that why she looks a wreck?


My sister wanted to marry a man clever enough to make a lot of money but dumb enough to spend it on her!


My sister is so dim she thinks that a cartoon is a song you sing in a car.

Dan: My little brother is a real pain.
Nan: Things could be worse.
Dan: How?
Nan: He could be twins!


My brother just opened a shop.
Really? How’s he doing?
Six months. He opened it with a crowbar.


My brother’s one of the biggest stickup men in town. Gosh is he really? Yes, he’s a six-foot-six billposter.


Michael: It’s hard for my sister to eat.
Maureen: Why?
Michael: She can’t bear to stop talking.


Do you like my new baby sister? The stalk bought her. Hmm, it looks as if the stalk dropped her on her head.


Doctor, Doctor! my sister thinks she’s an elevator.
Tell her to come in.
I can’t. She doesn’t stop at this floor.


Alfie was listening to his sister practice her singing. Sis, he said, I wish you’d sing Christmas carols. That’s nice of you, Alfie, she replied. Why?


What did Luke Skywalker say when he saw someone bullying his sister?
You better not Leia finger on her!


Brother: You’re nuts!
Sister: What do you mean? You’re the one with the nuts!


He told me he no longer wanted to be my brother,
but now my sister.


Are you familiar with the party a little boy had for his sister’s dolls?
It was a Barbie-Q.


My son Luke loves that we named him after a Star Wars character.
His sister Chewbacca not so much.


Is there anything the pond brother told his lake sister?
Oasis! (Oh hey sis!)


So, my mom and dad cheated on each other with their respective brother and sisters-in-law…….
Now, that I have your attention, I would like to reach you about your pending car insurance loan……..

Sister Jokes One Liners

Philosophy was the major my sister chose. The other day, I saw her crying because she was afraid, she wouldn’t get a job. This fits best into the category of sister jokes one-liners.

My sister wanted to marry a postman.
but our parents didn’t letter.


I made my mother’s French sister angry.
Now she’s a cross aunt.


I miss my sister’s dog.
I haven’t seen her in a dog’s age.


What did one cell say to his sister when she stepped on his toe?
Mitosis!


My mom’s sister runs the local candlelight services for the community.
She is a vigil-aunty.


My sister becomes physically ill when I burn her toast.
It turns out she’s black-toast-intilerant.


My sister bet me $100 that it was impossible for me to build a working car out of spaghetti.
You should have seen her face as I drove pasta.


What do you call it when a sister of the church is speaking gibberish?
Nun-sense!


Why couldn’t Sam ever get along with his Father’s sister, Ithesis?
Because she was his…


My sister was complaining her online dating profile only attract pigs.
She’s a real babe magnet.


What can you use to throw a sister?
Nunchucks.


My mum’s sister keeps taking the law into her own hands…
She’s a vigilauntie.

Clean Sister Jokes

One of the clean sister jokes might be, this morning when I tickled my tiny sister’s foot, my mother freaked out. Waiting till she was born, or something.

My sister thinks she’s so smart, she said onions are the only food that makes you cry, So I threw a coconut at her.


My mom said take out the trash and I said okay. The next day she asked “where is your sister”, and I said in line to get crushed.


Sometimes I feel ugly, then I think of my sister and feel better


My friend got mad when he caught me smelling his sister’s panties.
I don’t know why he was mad, maybe because she was wearing them, or because his whole family was watching.
Either way it made the funeral a bit awkward.


What do you say to your sister when she’s crying? – “Are you having a crisis?”


A girl noticed hair growing between her legs and asked her mom about it. Her mom said it was her monkey and it grows hair. So she told her sister and her sister said that aint nothing mines already eating bananas.


Son: Dad, why did name my sister Paris?
Dad: Because she was made there.
Son: Thanks, Dad.
Dad: You’re welcome, Backseat.


My friend told me he had a sister. I asked if she was hot and he said she was 8. That wasn’t my question.


My sister and I were both adopted from the same country, and my parents say they got us on a “two for one special.”


What’s the best part about plowing your cousin?
It makes your sister jealous.


Best friend: dude your sister is hot I’d Hit that
Me: already did SWEEETT HOMMEE ALABAMA.


So there’s this uncle of female and male twins, and his sister, the mother of the twins, is stuck trying to think of a name for the children.
The uncle says “I’ve got an idea!”, and the mother gets excited, thinking this could be it.
She says “What should their names be?”
The uncle replies “Well for your daughter, Denise”
“That’s a nice name” comments the mother, “but what about my son?”
The uncle simply replies “Denephew”.

Nice Sister Jokes

I answered alright when my mother told me to take out the garbage. The next day when she inquired about my sister, I said, “In line to be crushed.”. This is one of the nice sister jokes.

“Hey dad why is my sister called Teresa?”
“Because your mum loves easter and it’s an anagram of easter!”
“Thanks dad!”
“No problem Alan”


My wife texted “I’m leaving you”
And followed with “after lunch to go shopping with my sister.”
I asked why in the world she sent the message that way. “I just wanted you to realize how good you have it with me.”
I texted her back “Remind your sister she said she would come over later to give me a hand job”
A minute later I finished the message “-searching and resume building.”


Girl: Dad, do you believe in abortion?
Father: Ask your sister.
Girl: I don’t have a sister…
Father: Exactly.


My sister bet me I couldn’t make a car out of spaghetti…
You should have seen her face as I drove pasta


“Dad, I’m a lesbian.”
Confesses the daughter.
Her younger sister shouts from the kitchen “Me too dad.”
“Goddammit” Exclaims the father. “Will one of you bring a man to this house!?”
“I will, Dad.” Says the son from his room.


My little sister made a face at my mom and said “Guess who I am?”
My mom answered “Who?”
“Your daughter”


“Hurt me!” she cried, jumping onto the bed and stripping her clothes off seductively…
“Alright,” I said. “You’re a terrible cook and I fancy your sister.”


How did the redneck find his sister in the woods?
Attractive.

Older Sister Jokes

I always choose the elevator over the stairs, unlike my older sister. I suppose our upbringings were different. This fits well into the genre of older sister jokes.

Anne recently noticed she had hair growing between her legs…
Frantic, she asks her mom what’s going on.
Her mother replies, “Don’t worry sweetie, the part where the hair grows is called the Monkey. Be proud that your Monkey is growing hair.”
The girl sighs in relief, and later at the dinner table she smiled and told her older sister Beth, “I’ve got hair growing on my Monkey.”
The sister laughs and replies back, “That’s nothing, mine is already eating bananas.”


When he was a teenager, little Johnny’s father caught him reading one of his older sister’s magazines. Son, why are you reading that sissy magazine? he asked.
There’s an article that tells women where to meet men, Johnny responded, pointing to the magazine’s cover. I need to know where I’m supposed to be.


A young girl hit puberty and her body started to change.
One day she noticed she was getting hair down there.
She went to her mom confused and the mom explained that’s your gorilla and it’s getting hair.
Very excited the young girl went to her older sister and exclaimed my gorilla is getting hair!
The older sister looked at her and said that’s nothing, my gorilla is already eating bananas.
 

When I was a girl I had a disease that required me to eat dirt four times a day in order to survive… It’s a good thing my older sister told me about it.


My 11-year-old grandson spent
a beautiful Saturday playing video games. His older sister tried coaxing him outside by warning, Someday, you’re going to be 30 years old, single, and living in Mom’s basement playing video games all day!
His reply: I can only dream.


A girl in Japan had an older sister who owned a car company. What was that company?
Nee-san.


My older sister constantly and incorrectly uses the word “ironic” to describe situations in her life.
It’s pretty ironic.


A young son declared, When grow up, I’m going to marry you, Mommy.
You can’t marry your own mother, said his older sister.
Then I’ll marry you.
You can’t marry me either.
He looked confused, so I explained, You can’t marry someone in your own family.
You mean I have to marry a total stranger?! he cried.


A kid asked his mother why his sister was named rose.
His mother replied to him, explaining that roses were her favorite color.
He then asked her the same question in regards to his own name.
“You’ll get it when you’re older, Richard,” she responded.
E: I know I said color instead of flower, but I am leaving it.


My older brother annoyed me, so I gave him condoms with holes in them.
My sister got pregnant.


What did the baby milk say to his older sister?
You’re spoiled!


My sister said when she’s older she wants to live on an island off of the coast of Italy.
I replied “Don’t be sosilly”

Little Sister Jokes

It was a terrible accident that resulted in my little sister losing her tongue. A joke about that might be funny to me, but I’m not sure it would be tasteful. This fits best into the category of little sister jokes.

What makes you so annoying?
A younger sister.


While growing up, my parents always told me to try again when I fail,
which is why I have a little sister.


When you ask your sister if she wanna smash, but then she grabs the switch.


My daughter is the most adorable little girl in the world.
She’s got my sister’s eyes.


I tickled my little sister’s foot this morning and my mum went crazy about it.
Something about waiting until she was born.

Mean Sister Jokes

Want to know some funny things to say to your sisters? Well, we’ll help you. Have a look at this one of the mean sister jokes. I’m sure you’ll find it relatable and funny. This Is, When I feel unattractive, thinking about my sister makes me feel better.

I bought my little sister a trampoline for her birthday but all she wants to do is sit in her wheelchair and cry.


What do you call a cow with no legs?
My severely diabetic sister.


I have a half-sister.
Shark attacks are brutal.


Let’s play Cinderella.
You can be the ugly step sister.


When I feel ugly,
I think of my sister and feel better.


I told my sister I was into incest.
She took it really hard.


I’m taking to my sister and she said ‘I’m missing you, Sis and your funny jokes’ aww I miss her so much too!
 

I just hate sharing my sister with ANYONE!!! I know I’m to old for that but that’s my sister, my ONLY full blood sister.


I just tripped over my sister’s bras. I guess it was a booby trap.


Last Christmas my sister, Geri, gave me a lovely Cloth calendar. It only took me 5 hours to sew in a doctor’s appointment…


A sister will always notice her sister’s first gray hairs with glee.

 
Never praise a sister to a sister in the hope of your compliments reaching the proper ears.


If your sister is in a tearing hurry to go out and cannot catch your eye, she’s wearing your best sweater.


What’s the good of news if you haven’t a sister to share it?

Final Thoughts on Sister Jokes

Among the most crucial connections in your life is with your sister. These amusing jokes about sisters perfectly express the joy, love, and humor that come with having one.

You now have it. The craziest sister jokes you’ve probably never heard. Sisters may be tender, caring people who make you want to thank God for bringing them into your life, or the opposite may be true. They are the sweetest creatures on earth!

In any event, whether they are good or bad, sisters are like twins who should always be treasured. Furthermore, we don’t fully appreciate our sisters’ beautiful sides until we are older since kids are by nature funny. Therefore, it is only fitting that we make jokes about our sisters.

Sisters make the finest companions, the best memories, and your best line of defense. Your sister will be there for you at the funniest times and the most heartfelt sorrowful ones.