155 Hilarious Giraffe Jokes to Bring a Long Long Laugh
“Laughter is the shortest distance between two people.” This quote by Victor Borge captures the connection that humor can bring.
We have gathered the funniest and most hilarious giraffe jokes that will make you laugh in our effort to spread laughter.
Prepare yourself for a wild ride of puns, one-liners, knock-knock jokes, and even some jokes for adults.
These giraffe jokes are sure to bring a smile to your face.
So, get ready for a long-lasting laugh with this collection of giraffe-themed comedy.
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Table of Contents
Best Giraffe Jokes
The funniest giraffe jokes ever told will be presented to you as you enter the world of entertainment. Get ready for a trip to the land of laughter.
How does a giraffe win a race?
At breakneck speed.
Have you heard the joke about the giraffe’s neck?
It’s a long one.
Why do giraffes sing in the rain?
Because they don’t fit in the shower.
What kind of magic does a love-struck giraffe practice?
Neck-romance-y.
What did the giraffe say to his friend?
I’m always sticking my neck out for you.
How did the giraffe get a job?
By neck working.
What do you get if you cross a giraffe with a hedgehog?
A 12ft tooth brush.
What do you call an animal that can transform into a boat?
A Gi-raft.
What happens when a giraffe swallows a toy jet?
They get a plane in the neck.
When does a giraffe have eight legs?
When there’s two of them.
What’s the silliest name you can give a giraffe?
Stumpy.
What do giraffes have that no one else has?
Baby giraffes!
What’s worse than a giraffe with a sore throat?
A centipede with athlete’s foot.
When does a giraffe have 8 legs?
When there are two of them!
Why did the giraffe sign up for monk training?
He felt a higher calling.
How do you write a report on a giraffe?
First, you get a really tall ladder …
Did you hear about the Giraffe and Ostrich race?
It was neck and neck.
Why did the giraffe get bad grades?
He had his head in the clouds.
Why do giraffes have long necks?
So that it will reach their head.
Why is it cheap to feed a giraffe?
Because a little goes a long way.
What do you call a royal giraffe?
Your highness.
Teacher: Name me 5 animals you can see in Africa?
Student: 4 giraffes and an elephant.
Funny Giraffe Jokes
The best medicine, so they say, is laughing, and what better way to lighten the mood than with these hilarious giraffe jokes? Our string of gags is sure to make you laugh.
What did Dracula say then he saw a giraffe for the first time?
I’d like to get to gnaw you.
Why did the giraffe break up with her boyfriend?
He was a cheetah.
What do giraffes do if they get involved in a fight? Nothing.
They look down on that kind of thing.
What is a giraffe’s favorite beer?
High-neck’.
Why didn’t people laugh at the giraffe’s joke?
It went over their heads.
What do two giraffes have in common?
Neither can ride a bike
Why don’t giraffes do drugs?
Because they’re naturally high.
Why don’t most restaurants serve giraffe?
Because it’s a tall order.
What do you get if cross a turtle with a giraffe and a kangaroo?
A turtle-neck jumper.
What do you call it when a giraffe swallows a toy jet?
A plane in the neck.
What do you get if you cross a giraffe and a hedgehog?
An extra-long toilet brush.
Why is a giraffe’s neck so long?
Because its head is so far from its body.
How was the first giraffe made?
Chuck Norris uppercut a horse.
What do you get when you cross a giraffe with a hedgehog?
A twelve-foot toothbrush.
How do you put a giraffe into the refrigerator?
With difficulty.
What do giraffes and cheetahs have in common?
Spots.
How did the giraffe hide in the cherry tree?
It painted its toes red and stayed perfectly still.
What do you call a giraffe that has been bought online?
A tall order.
Why is it difficult to make a giraffe laugh?
Because you have to use a ladder to tickle its neck.
You’re riding a giraffe and a tiger is chasing you. What do you do?
You get off the merry-go-round.
Knock Knock Giraffe Jokes
It’s time for some giraffe knock-knock jokes! Open the door to a world of entertainment as we bring you a heap of them!
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Giraffe.
Giraffe who?
Giraffe anything to eat? I’m starving!
Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Giraffe
Giraffe who?
Giraffe to ask me that stupid question!
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
I am.
I am who?
I am who is knocking. Who are you? I am giraffe.
Knock knock
Who’s there?
Giraffe.
Giraffe who? Giraffe on your doorstep, open up!
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Giraffe say.
Giraffe say who? Yes, they do!
Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Justin.
Justin who?
Just in time for some unique Giraffe rod-referring!
Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Fish.
Fish who?
Giraffe -ious temper you have there, you need to calm down!
Giraffe Jokes One Liners
Sometimes, the simplest jokes are the funniest. These powerfully funny jokes will keep you in a good mood and chuckling all day long!
An introvert elephant and an emo giraffe walked into a bar. They couldn’t fit in.
The worst part about being a giraffe…Is having a lot of time to think about your mistakes when you’re sinking into quicksand.
One of the seven dwarfs kissed a giraffe yesterday. Apparently the other six put him up to it.
The worst thing about being a male giraffe is having your neck being the only long part of your body.
Giraffes are careful and make wonderful workers. Only problem is their neck ties cost $7000.
The worst thing about being a giraffe is needing 100 Heimlich maneuvers when you are choking.
Some Giraffes can grow up to 18 feet. But most only have 4
The worst thing about being a giraffe is having a sore throat
The worst thing about being a giraffe is vomiting after you drank too much! Ewww
I bet on a giraffe race the other day. Mine lost by a neck. It was nowhere near the finish line.
The giraffe at our local zoo graduated early from university. He was head and shoulders above the rest of his class.
My mate told me he was eating an odd animal in a game restaurant. I think he was having a giraffe.
The teacher asked Billy to name 10 animals you could see in Africa. He replied: ”nine giraffes and an elephant”.
Did you know that giraffes can grow up to 18 feet? I’ve only seen them with four feet.
It takes a big man to admit his mistakes. But it takes an even bigger man to give a giraffe a haircut.
A man walks into a bar, goes up to the bartender, and asks her to make him a giraffe. Taken aback, she replies, “Well, that’s a tall order!”
Our local zoo only has giraffes. It’s called Giraffic Park.
I was going to tell you a giraffe joke. But it’s too long.
One of the seven dwarves kissed a giraffe yesterday. Apparently the other six dwarves put him up to it.
I’ve just bought a giraffe online. I doubt it will be delivered, I think it might be a tall order.
I bet giraffes don’t even know what farts smell like.
When a giraffe eats a small snack, a little goes a long way.
I had a bet on a giraffe race yesterday but my selection lost. It was nowhere near winning – it lost by a neck.
Giraffes are hardworking and make amazing employees. The only problem is their neckties cost $5000.
Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin and giraffes were born.
Rude Giraffe Jokes
We present a selection of rude giraffe jokes. If you’re up for some edgy humor, they’re guaranteed to give you a good laugh. Proceed with caution!
You’re riding a horse full speed, there’s a giraffe beside you and you’re being chased by a lion. What do you do?
Get your drunk ass off the carousel.
A giraffe walks into a bar
And says “high balls are on me”
Why don’t you see elephants hiding in trees? Because they are really good at it.
Why do elephants paint their balls red?
So they can hide in cherry trees.
What’s the loudest sound in the jungle?
Giraffes eating cherries
Did you hear the one about the giraffe who learned Karate?
He looked like a fucking idiot.
Fucking smug giraffes,
Always looking down on me.
TIL Giraffe penises are 40in. long
Which explains their long necks
Please don’t bother teaching a giraffe to perform fellatio.
It’s just not going to go down well.
A man and a giraffe walk into a bar…
They both get pissed drunk and pass out.
The man wakes up, pays his tab, begins to leave and the bartender points and says:
“Oi! You can’t leave that lyin’ there!”
The man turns and says:
“It’s not a lion, it’s a giraffe.”
Giraffe Jokes for Adults
Humor knows no age limits, and neither do our giraffe jokes. If you’re looking for jokes that cater to a more mature audience, we have you covered.
Why didn’t the theatre audience laugh at the giraffe’s jokes?
Because they went over their heads.
What do you get when you cross a giraffe and a pig?
Bacon and legs.
Why don’t lions like giraffes?
Because they always look down on them.
What do you call a wizard?
A neck romancer.
Did you hear about the man who made giraffe and lion jam?
He called it Wildlife Preserve.
What happened in the race between the giraffe and the ostrich?
It was neck and neck the whole way.
Why did the giraffe get promoted to manager at the zoo?
Because people looked up to him.
Where do giraffes go if they don’t feel well?
Giraffe-Sick Park.
What’s the most dangerous book you can read?
A pop-up book about giraffes.
What did Dracula say when he met the giraffe?
I’d like to get to gnaw you.
Why do giraffe children have bad teeth?
Because they CAN reach the biscuit tin!
Why don’t giraffes like to go to playgrounds?
Because the monkeys use them as slides.
How do you get a giraffe in a fridge?
Open the door and take out the penguins.
Why don’t giraffes like fast food?
Because they can’t catch it!
Why did the elephant paint his toenails red?
So he could hide up cherry trees.
What do you call a giraffe without a bowtie?
Neck-ed.
Why didn’t the giraffe get invited to the party?
Because he was a pain in the neck.
Why did the giraffe leave her boyfriend?
He was a Cheetah!
What’s green and hangs from tall trees?
Giraffe boogers.
What do you call a giraffe’s birthday?
A launch date.
Why people never believe giraffes?
Because they tell tall tales
How many surrealists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two. One to hold the giraffe, and one to fill the bathtub with brightly colored machine tools.
Did you know Ronnie Pickering invented the giraffe?
He got into an argument with a horse and uppercutted it
Giraffe Jokes for Kids
Children enjoy a good chuckle, and giraffe jokes are a great way to keep them amused. Laugh together with your young ones!
Why don’t you see giraffes in elementary school?
Because they’re all in high school
A giraffe walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender says “you want a longneck?” The giraffe says “you mean I have a choice?”
I respect giraffes… They’re an animal I can look up to.
What do you get if you cross a giraffes with a police-man?
Long-arm of the Law!
What do you get if cross a Turtle with a Giraffe?
A Turtle-Neck.
Did you know that a giraffe’s neck is strong enough to support the weight of a human climbing on it?
Anyway, I got banned from my local zoo today.
What do you call a giraffe winning a horse race?
A longshot.
Why the giraffe was so well respected at the zoo?
Because everybody looked up to him.
What do you call an animal that turns into a boat?
A GIRRAFT.
A lion and a giraffe are meeting at the zoo Lion: “You are late! We said to meet at sunset!” Giraffe: “I can still see the sun.
I suppose when you’ve seen one lion catch a giraffe… you’ve seen a maul.
I read about a heartwarming story of several doctors performing overnight surgery on a giraffe’s knee… I guess it was a joint operation.
The worst thing about being a giraffe is that your coffee gets cold by the time it reaches your belly.
What is a giraffe’s favorite fruit?
Nectarines.
What do you call a mural of a giraffe in the street?
Giraffiti.
How do you interview a giraffe?
First, you get a really tall ladder.
Why don’t giraffes like to go to the playground?
Because the monkeys use them for slides.
What school of magic does a Giraffe practice?
Necromancy.
Giraffe Jokes and Puns
Do you want a series of giraffe jokes and puns? You will have to brainstorm a little to taste the fun! Get in the lane for joy!
Why don’t giraffes make good pets?
They’re too high maintenance.
What do you get when you cross a Labrador with a giraffe?
A dog who barks at airplanes.
What sort of art do giraffes paint?
Giraffiti.
What did the giraffe say to the cat in the tree?
Get out of my dinner.
What do you get if you cross a tortoise, a giraffe and a kangaroo?
A turtleneck jumper.
What do you call several doctors performing surgery on a giraffe’s knee?
A joint operation.
Why did the giraffe leave his girlfriend?
Because she was a Cheetah.
What is worse than a giraffe with a sore throat?
A milipede with athlete’s foot.
What’s green and hangs from trees?
Giraffe snot.
What do you call a royal giraffe?
Your high-ness.
Why do giraffes have such long necks?
Because their heads are so far from their body
Why don’t giraffes wear scarfs?
There’s not enough wool to knit one.
Why do giraffes make bad bosses?
Because they can’t see eye-to-eye with their employees
Why don’t most restaurants serve giraffes?
It’s a tall order.
Why did none of the giraffe’s friends ever laugh when she told a joke?
It always went over their heads.
What’s the silliest nickname you can give a giraffe?
Shorty.
Why don’t giraffes like fast food?
Because they can’t catch it.
Why did the giraffe cross the road?
He couldn’t fit under the bridge.
What do you get if you cross a giraffe with a lawyer?
Long-arm of the Law.
Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?
It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
Why did the giraffe fire the flamingo?
They didn’t see eye-to-eye.
What did the giraffe wear to the fancy party?
Ten bow ties.
What do giraffes do at Christmas time?
Neck the halls.
What’s wooly and 15 meters long?
A giraffe scarf.
Final Thoughts
In conclusion, giraffe jokes have proven to be a source of endless laughter. We hope that our collection of hilarious giraffe jokes has made your day!
Laughter is contagious, so why not share these jokes with your friends, family, and colleagues?
Indeed! A good joke is like a giraffe’s neck—long-lasting and always uplifting!
Spread the joy and let the giggles run wild! We would love to hear your favorite giraffe jokes and any funny experiences you’ve had related to them.
