98 Hilarious Boat Puns That’ll Shore-ly Crack You Up
Looking for nice boat puns in the seven seas? Drop your anchor here for the most comprehensive list of witty boat puns! Boating is really fun, exciting, and relaxing!
What does your ideal weekend entail? Sailing on the water as the sun provides you with the necessary warmth. Then maybe start posing like the Titanic’s main characters.
It’s always exciting to speak about boat rides, and not only because of the exhilaration of being out on the water. There are numerous legends and anecdotes from various cultures across the world that revolve around boat voyages.
A nice boat pun or joke may make you appreciate your boat and the lifestyle it entails. There are many amusing boat names and sea jokes out there, but nothing matches a good boat pun in our opinion.
The collection of witty boat puns we’re about to share with you is sure to make you and your pals laugh – some of them are so funny that they’ve even been used as humorous boat names. So, without further ado, let’s plunge into the sea of ship puns.
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Table of Contents
Best Boat Puns
Whether you’re with your buddies soaking up the sun on a lake or with your family floating the ocean on a ship, you’ll want some of the best boat puns with you for all the wonderful photos you capture along the way. Here are some boat play on words that you may make use of.
1. This big speed boat shot past me the other day. Turns out it was Usain Boat.
2. How were the goods transported through the boat? With the help of car-go.
3. What method do the aging boats use to look younger? They usually go for a boat- tox.
4. Where do you take a sick boat? To the dock.
5. I spent my children’s college fund on a boat. I’m going to call it the scholarship.
6. The cast of Friends got stuck at sea in a boat, but thankfully nothing happened. Because Lisa Kudrow, and David was a good Schwimmer.
7. Two boats passed each other in the ocean the other day. The first boat said “Hello”. While the second boat said “Water you doing here?”
8. Swapped my boat for a new ship I hadn’t seen before. I thought it was worth a punt.
9. It’s al-waves a pleasure whenever we hang out together on the boat.
10. What is one way to save money when you go to the lake? Buy a “sale boat.”
11. A canoe asked a tug whether he’d been to the Atlantic. “Oh, no,” he replied. “I wouldn’t go there. I have very Pacific tastes.”
12. How many boats are trying to get through the Suez Canal now that it’s unblocked? A ship-ton!
13. A brother and sister were arguing about oars in their boat. They were having a row.
14. The baby boats are all scared of the boat teacher. She’s very stern.
15. At the end of the story telling, it was clear that the narrator was a ferry talented man.
16. What do you call a bot that likes to sit in a canoe? A row-bot.
Funny Boat Puns
It’s possible that you have a child that is obsessed with tugboats. Maybe you’re the one with a minor fixation with ships. You could even be the type of person that finds boat coloring sheets to be a relaxing hobby. Whatever has led you here, you will not go empty-handed. Here are some of the best funny boat puns for you.
1. I didn’t choose the tugboat life, the tugboat life chose me. This is my Pug boat.
2. What happened when the brother and sister disagreed about oars in a boat? They had a row.
3. I have some amazing boat stories to tell. All of them have a ferry tail ending.
4. What type of vegetable can you not take on a boat? A leek.
5. My wife asked me which paddle I wanted to use in the boat. I answered “either/oar.”
6. Why did the sea captain fall ill after looking at his boating test score? He got C-sick.
7. There’s a man that keeps walking around the harbor sticking poles on all of the boats. He is the harbor mast-er.
8. Did you guys hear about the boat that got stuck in the Suez canal? Waterway to get stuck.
9. Saw a pirate standing in a pile of gold on his ship that came part way up his legs. He learned that his booty was only shin deep.
10. I was saddened to learn that my cousin was run over by a boat in Venice today. I sent his family my gondolances.
11. A pontoon boat carrying red paint crashed into a boat carrying blue paint. The crew were marooned.
12. The guy wants to go on a dangerous boat ride and you keep telling him to try it out. Stop anchoraging him.
13. What is it called when someone who is sitting across from you in the ship completely understands your current problems? Someone who’s in the same boat.
14. These boardwalks are upsetting my yacht. She doesn’t like mooring here because of the pier pressure.
15. When everybody else believed that the infection was a passing wind, I took no chances and went to see a docktor.
16. Rowers are a blast at every party: it’s because they know how to rock the boat!
Hilarious Boat Puns
If you’re feeling like a fish out of water, we’ve got something extremely special for you. Here are some hilarious boat puns that will give you a much needed dose of fun and laugh.
1. The rowboat used to be the fastest boat in the marina. It’s yacht anymore.
2. Did you guys hear about the guy that sells oversized ping pong paddles? Sounds like a big racket to me.
3. Before my operation, the anesthesiologist asked if I wanted to be knocked out via gas or boat paddle. It was an ether/oar situation.
4. The captain took the ferry to the mechanic. The mechanic says, “Would you like a new paint job?” The captain says, “No thank you, it’s already in ship shape.”
5. People used to put a lot of trust in the ship-making industry. But then the unsinkable happened.
6. What kind of melody does a ship makes when if it crashes on shore? A wreck-quiem.
7. I bought a sail for my boat on Amazon the other day. Today it dawned on me that it’s not the right size, so I tried to cancel the order. They said it’s too late. That sail has shipped.
8. I just managed to swap my boat for a new model I hadn’t seen before. I thought it was worth a punt.
9. Why do you want something that you like to help keep your vessel from sinking? Because whatever floats your boat works.
10. A catamaran in the frostbite series race lost its mast and was nearly overturned by a large wave. The headline in the club newsletter the next day was “Cata-frostic Dismaster.”
11.I’m afraid knot, knot for sail, knot on my watch, knotty or nice, knot too shabby, More often than knot.
12. My friend told me about his new boat. Apparently, it has a canopy.
I said “Well, better than a can o’ poo.”
13. I took my boat out to go fishing today. I looked over and saw my neighbor’s dock was parallel to mine. I guess I found my self in a real “para-docks”
14. A rope asked if it was getting a Christmas present. “Depends if you’re knotty or nice,” the sailor replied.
15. My local sports store had an overstock of boat paddles, so they decided to have a sale. It was quite an oardeal.
Clever Boat Puns
Let us now go through some clever boat puns. Whether you’re looking for a boat name, in the middle of a pun fight, or just practicing your nautical wordplay, we hope you find this list of puns related to boat handy!
1. A ferryboat came and dropped off a load of meat and cheese at my house. It was a deliferry.
2. Why did the motorboat sink when it was moored against the pontoon? It gave in to pier pressure.
3. My local store is having a big sale on rowing paddles. It is an amazing oart deal.
4. I saw an advert in the paper “Yacht for sale”. As if people don’t know what a yacht is for.
5. Why are bad school grades like a shipwreck in the Arctic Ocean? They’re both below C level!
6. My friend sailed his yacht into the wharf very rapidly, crashing into the dock and causing a dent in the hull. It’s just a berth mark, he swears.
7. When a boat isn’t feeling well, it goes to the dock.
8. On our last voyage, I refused to live in the same cabin as the captain. This didn’t boat dwell with him.
9. If you expect me to go on a boat without wearing a life jacket, I am telling you right now that is knot happening.
10. Why do scuba divers go backwards out the boat? Cause if they went forwards they’d still be in the boat.
11. 4 men were sitting in a boat about to smoke a cigarette, when they realized they didn’t have a cigarette lighter. So, they threw one cigarette off their boat and the boat became one cigarette lighter.
12. How did they punish the longshoreman whose improper ship mooring caused the destruction of a pier? They docked his pay.
13. Was going to make a yacht out of stone but it was too much of a hardship.
14. My dad would always tell me that, if my canoe flipped over, I could just use it as a hat… because it’s capsized.
15. We have a metal paddle for our canoe…I told the kids it’s iron oar.
Dirty Boat Puns
Dirty boat puns, no matter how corny they are, can make almost anyone grin. You could use one of these jokes to caption your next boat selfie. This will make your buddies as happy as a wonderful sea day does for you.
1. Why are boats not weirded out by another boat and their activities? Because they respect whatever floats each other’s boats.
2. As I gently slipped my finger slowly inside her hole, I could feel it getting wetter and wetter. I slipped my finger back out, and within seconds, she was going down on me. I thought to myself, I really need a new boat.
3. I told my ex-wife she should become a boat captain…She’s so good at dealing with loads of semen.
4. I saw a drunk dude riding in a boat on the chests of four women with average bust size, one of whom had a single mastectomy. He was sailing on the seven C’s
5. Are you a bowman? Because I’d love to see you blow the guy.
6. The bartender asked the pirate, “Is that a ship’s wheel sticking out of your pants?” The pirate replied “Aye! It’s driving me nuts!”
7. Are you a tug boat? Because, I want you to tug my large vessel.
8. Did you hear about the boat that had a baby? It was a buoy!
9. What do you do with a drunker sailor? Worry he’s gonna get wrecked!
10. What did Watson say to his boss when he noticed their boat had to be towed? No shit! Sherlock.
Romantic Boat Puns
Nothing beats being out on the ocean, sailing on a bright day. It’s no surprise that you want to do a Rose from Titanic and stand at the front of the boat yelling, “I’m flying!” If you’re in the mood for some romance while sailing, here are some romantic boat puns for you to enjoy.
1. Fix your wrinkles with some boat-ox. I like big boats and I cannot lie. It’s aboat time. Pain in the boat. Usain boat. What’s this all aboat? You are so boat-iful to me…
2. What did one boat say to the other boat? Are we up for a little row-mance?
3. Are you the boat from finding nemo? Because from the moment I saw you, I am lost.
4. Why did the girl boat have problems sailing? She didn’t have boy-ancy! (Buoyancy).
5. I’m not much for boats. But I can see myself in a ship with you.
6. I own a lot of rope and it comes in all sorts of pretty colors. How ‘boat I tie you up and do it to you.
7. Why do oars fall in love? Because they’re row-mantic.
8. Nice dock, mind if I park my boat in it?
9. I’m all a-boat loving you.
10. Did you hear about the oars that fell in love? It was very row-mantic!
Sail Boat Puns
Let’s look at some sailing puns now. Consider the expressions on your friends’ faces as you use these puns in a discussion with them. So drop your anchor and claw your way through the finest boat puns on our list.
1. My anchor rope started talking to me, so I asked if it was a person now. “I’m a frayed knot,” it replied.
2. Sail-abrate good times, come on! Sailbait, Sail Hydra, Sail Yeah!
3. Why are portholes on boats round? So the water doesn’t hit the sailors square in the face.
4. I saw a sailor with a big bushy beautiful beard today. Was it a navel beard? No, his beard was on his chin.
5. Did you hear about the Yacht builder that had to work from home? His sails went through the roof.
6. What do sailors buy to customise the back of their ships? Aft-ermarket parts!
7. How do you know you are getting a good deal on a boat? When there’s a sail on it.
8. What do you call a sail with only two corners? I haven’t got a clew!
9. Why did the sailor ignore the other sailor after he asked him the 10th question in one hour? He was becoming a pain in the boat.
10. Did you hear about the sea captain who made a special salt-proof boat for the salty waters of the ocean? It was a sailing solution to cross a saline solution.
11. Shopping is fun and all, but this is my favorite kind of sail.
12. As we were sailing across the creek, we kept on asking one another whether any of us wreckens will make it through the storm.
13. What is the term about being nervous about going sailing for the first time? Having boat-erflies in your stomach.
Boat Puns Captions for Instagram
So, if you’re searching for a caption for a photo of you basking in the sun on a boat, go for a pun. Here are some boat puns captions for Instagram that you may use.
1. I’m knot shore if you noticed, but I’m on a boat.
2. I don’t plan on taking the highway today, I think I’d rather try taking the sea-nic route to the docks.
3. I had the idea that schooner or later nothing can stop me from getting out on the water.
4. It’s going to be a long time with no sea.
5. I’m ferry impressed by this sea day.
6. It’s aboat time we all made it out on the water.
7. I started a successful boat building business in the attic of my house. Sails are going through the roof!
8. Forever in need of some vitamin sea.
9. It’s- a boat- time- we- all- made- it- out- on- the- water.
10. Having yachts of fun with my grill friends.
11. Shells Sink, Dreams Float. Life’s Good on Our Boat.
12. Do not tie me down, pier. My boat is calling for me.
13. This is the mast fun I’ve had in a long time.
14. Rowing is a great sport, truly oar-inspiring.
Final Thoughts on Boat Puns
Boat puns and jokes may not be the first things that come to mind when you’re looking for something amusing to say. They should, though. Nothing like some nice yacht puns and jokes to liven things up.
If you’re on a lengthy boat journey, observing the water with your significant other, or simply looking for something witty to say, these are perfect. We had a lot of fun gathering these boat puns, and we hope you liked reading them as much as we did!
Aren’t these boat name puns and jokes hilarious? We understand if you were suspicious at first when we mentioned these, but we bet they grew on you.
Send them along if you have any boat puns you believe should be on the list. They will undoubtedly be added to our list.
